Becoming a Girl … Again

Not a girly girl in my childhood years, later on “dressing” became the tool to attract male attention … but it wasn’t until I met someone special that I felt inspired to dress in soft, feminine, flowing clothes instead of the tailored attire I had worn mostly till then.

Pretty lace and ruffles, long flowing dresses, and skirts had appealed to me for years, but were viewed by my circles as frivolous and strange for everyday wear, even for special occasions because no one we knew wore them. Poet-inspired ruffled blouses or a fine, white, almost transparent cotton shirts, pants, and dresses seemed divine … but impractical in the world I lived in.

Self-conscious about my height because of all the teasing I endured as a young teen because I stood above the majority and later because the men I had dated and been married to were my height, heels were not favored by any of them.

But when I slipped on a pair of black patent pumps with three-inch heels to complement my long legs that were barely covered by a well-fitted, long-sleeved black knit dress and finally stood beside him in a dance embrace, the three-inch heels had pushed me up close to his height that motivated him to say, “A perfect fit.”

Years have gone by and no one since sighed the way he did when I walked down the hall with long hair and fabrics billowing in the breeze created by my purposeful stride.

After a “series of unfortunate events” we went our separate ways, professionally and personally, and though on occasion I put on a dress or heels for an evening out dancing with friends, putting on a dress never felt the same as it did back then … when I wore the clothes we both liked … for me and for him.

Interestingly enough, as my Respect Level continues to rise, more and more I feel the desire again to wear what I choose … what makes me feel like a girl again … not out to attract male’s attention … but to satisfy my own true tastes and preferences … because of how it makes me feel good about being me … and a girl again.

Astounding I am finding the experience as my Respect Level raises higher and higher … revealing truths, talents, beauty, and more that resides in each of us when we are more whole in our sense of being … because we are growing into our self-worth.

And yes, I do hope again, that one day I will feel what I felt when his eyes looked upon me … and he sighed with his whole being.

October 1, 2014

Kaitlin Ann Trepanier

Connecting the Dots … with The RESPECT PRINCIPLE author and altruistic entrepreneur … because every child … every person … should know, by their own experience, they are valued … RESPECTED. ©

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