Hi, Missy here. Before I leave earth I want to set a few things straight.
Most humans assume I am less than what I am. Just an animal, but people are animals too. Just a cat, but I am so much more than just a cat and certainly not just a pet. I even had to ask what the word meant and once I did, well, I am definitely so much more than “a creature kept as an object of affection!” “An adored one” is more like it, but even that does not tell the the whole truth.
Let me tell you my, no, Kaitlin’s and my story.
My birth mom pushed me out of the barn loft three times because I was sick and she did not want my brothers and sisters to get sick too. At first, Kaitlin tried to put me back up in the barn loft with my birth mom, but she was not having it so out of the loft I would fall, maybe with a little help. Kaitlin would find me again on the cold barn floor standing up on my hind legs trying to reach up to her. Finally she realized I needed a different mom and a new home. She understood because Kaitlin was rejected by her family too. They thought something was wrong with her and they did not want to catch it either, I guess.
The problem was Kaitlin did not own my home. Another human did. I did not like her much, but she let Kaitlin take me to the animal hospital to help me feel better. The animal doctor was not very nice. He called me Misfit and said I would not make it through the night, but I was going to show him!
When Kaitlin came back for me after a cold night in a strange place, there I was, still breathing and living. She talked very nice to me and unlike my birth mom, she snuggled me close. I was very hungry and when we got back home, she put me in a really big place, but it was warm, as was the special kitty milk Kaitlin fed me. I loved it when she rubbed my tummy because it felt good and helped my body digest my food. I liked being around her and was sad when she left at dark, but happy that after every darkness she came back to see, feed, snuggle, and love me.
As I grew a little stronger and bigger at four weeks old, Kaitlin took me into the place she lived with two other humans. the little human was rough with me and the big human said I was not very pretty, so I was glad when the big human told Kaitlin she could keep me because she was going to get her little human a prettier kitten. “Let me at her!” I tried to say with my kitty sounds, but of course, the big human did not understand. Scared of my sounds, the big human told Kaitlin to take me away and never come back, so we didn’t.
Oh, what adventures Kaitlin and I shared over twenty-two years, almost twenty three years! We lived in many different places, met all kinds of humans, some nice, many not so much, and travelled with many different humans.
Many humans liked to touch me, but I did not like it much. I liked Kaitlin’s touch because she knew how to touch my tiny body without hurting me.
When Kaitlin was gone too long, I would stand at the door to wait for her. As the door opened, I would howl loudly so she would know I was glad to see her, but also angry with her too for being away so long. I mean, I was happy being alone because I did not like crowded places, but too much time alone, even for me, was not much fun.
And I missed Kaitlin!
She was great fun to play with! I especially loved it when she wrapped me up in a harness attached to a leash so we could go outside! So many scents to smell and so many trees to climb. Oh, I was good! I am tiny, but muscular, strong, and have very long legs. My heart would race and my legs would churn fast under me and in seconds, I jumped onto a tree and was climbing furiously fast! I was amazing! At least, that’s what Kaitlin said to me. She called me Super Chic! She also has many other names for me besides Missy. The doctor named me Misfit, but she changed my name to Little miss, Missy for short. She also called me Peanut, Chiclet, and Pretty Girl.
No matter where we lived and what else she was doing, she always made time to take me outside because I could not go out on my own. Since I was little I was deaf to sounds behind me, but even when Kaitlin did not know that, she did not like me to go outside on my own, though I would have been happy to because I was not afraid! I think it’s because she thought I was too cute, as many people told us, and that someone would try to take me.
But when I was a teenager in human years, the day came when she discovered just how fierce I could be! That was the day she brought home that rascal! More than double my size and a silly tom cat, he thought he could have his way with me, but I let him know with a few swipes of my strong legs, sharp claws, and a lot of howling, I was having none of what he wanted to do with me.
I could not wait for the rascal to leave, but Kaitlin seemed to like the big bully she called Sammy. Accepting the fact he was staying after all, I told her flat out with lots of protests whenever he came near that she would have to keep him away from me forever. The standoff began and continues to this day.
But this is the last day.
Kaitlin knows I am hurting real bad and cannot stay with her much longer. She has done as much as she can do or became convinced she can do. Heck, we both know I was not expected to live past three weeks, yet I almost made it to my twenty-third year! I am sad for Kaitlin though because she has to make a difficult choice to do a difficult thing, but it grows easier as she sees how much I am suffering, no matter how much I try to hide it, because my little body is getting littler and not working the way it should.
And I would be worried for her too if she still did not have that rascal living here with us. I gotta give him credit though because Sammy loves her very much, not as much as me of course, but a whole bunch. Plus, he makes her laugh a lot because he still likes to play a lot and he is a bit more of a snuggler than me, but that’s only because I got used to being on my own a lot when I was young because Kaitlin had to be away a lot. Him, well, it’s kind of crazy how much attention he craves. Still, I am glad he will be with her. She needs love and love is not something that comes easy to her after all she’s been through. She is going to be okay because I loved her well too and I will always be with her, not just in the whatever she puts me into when I pass over, but with her soul and spirit when she cries out for my fierce love for her. I am happy we had each other to get through it all. It was quite a ride! I am eager to seeing my best friend, my mom, once again when her body gets tired like mine, but later than sooner because she still has someone who needs her love too.
I love you best Kaitlin. Your beautiful love filled me to the top every day. Thank you for giving me the best you could give every day.
Goodbye and live in peace my dearest friend. You are loved fiercely and unconditionally.
February 11, 2021
Writing “Missy’s Tale” helps me to grieve for the one being who kept me tethered to this world when I wanted desperately to leave it behind because of all I have endured as a person with a minority personality type, resulting in my being misunderstood, mistreated, and exploited, all of which ultimately drove me to live marginally the past twenty some years to avoid more of the same. I am still not fond of this world and how we treat other, but I think my little friend’s fearlessness and fierceness taught me to stand my ground and take my rightful place in the world again … this time with her and God’s help.
Please respect my copyright of this material.
Kaitlin Ann Trepanier
March 13, 2021