A Perspective on Empowerment

Raised a Catholic, I witnessed what I judged as hypocrisy that turned me away from religion and God. After exploring many other beliefs, now I know it was not the hypocrisy as much as it was ignorance on many people’s parts, plus my throwing the baby (God) with the bathwater (man’s interpretations).

My return to faith in God, Jesus, and the Holy Spirit has been a difficult and challenging experience for my dominant logical and practical mind, yet my return to faith has also strengthened my inherent compassion for all people, regardless of their beliefs, and therefore something I embrace wholeheartedly because even before I returned to God I believed every person, every life, should be respected simply for being a life and then our world would be a better place for us all. Of course, when I started reading the Bible for myself I discovered respect for all people is God’s desire also.

Whatever you believe, I share my poem/prayer not to offend, but to encourage and inspire celebration as an expression to God of my gratitude for adding so much joy to my life, empowering me to thrive in a world where people are disrespected in many ways and so I can do my part to change the world’s core principle of disrespect to respect.

Oh Heavenly Father

Thank you

for being like

an eagle with eaglets,

at first making our nests

comfy, safe, and warm,

but then, out of love,

piece by piece

removing the comfy bits

so we don’t want to stay

in the nest anymore.

 

Thank you too

for even pushing us

out of our safe nests

and then racing to catch

us as we fall towards the ground.

 

And most of all,

gratefully we cry out

our thank you

for not giving up on us

until we realize we are

not to live so bound

but are to flap our wings to fly –

to soar as you created us to do.

 

In sweet Jesus’s name, Amen.

Kaitlin Ann Trepanier, April 2019

 

KAITLIN ANN TREPANIER

Writer, Founder and President of Connecting The Dots With The Respect Principle

Smashwords interview @  www.smashwords.com

© All Rights Reserved 2014-2019 

September 8, 2019

 

 

 

Want to Pay Less Tax?

Responsible, respectful governments collect taxes to run a country. Taxes pay salaries, equipment, etc. to provide services from transportation to social support programs and many things in between the two, plus to invest in the future and global relations.

The more we load the government with social responsibility by not respecting everyone and all the resources available to us, the more taxes the government will have to collect to offset the increasing need.

Therefore, if we truly want to pay less taxes, then we need to reduce the ways our beliefs, thoughts, and actions contribute to keep development and maintenance costs high.

So the next time we are tempted to take advantage because we (individuals, groups, and organizations) can, we only need to remind ourselves that our action(s) may not result in a tax increase, but multiply that action by hundreds and thousands of people for a bigger-picture perspective because that fresh perspective has the power to help us change and create the bigger change of lower taxes we say we want.

KAITLIN ANN TREPANIER

Advocate Innovator Writer Social Entrepreneur & Founder

Connecting The Dots With The Respect Principle

Smashwords interview @  www.smashwords.com

© All Rights Reserved 2014-2019 

June 7, 2019

 

Becoming the Writer I Knew as a Child I Was Supposed to Be

How many of us knew as a child what we wanted to be when we grew up?

Though many of us go through phases as we discover the big world beyond the small world we grew up with, some of us, even many of us inherently know what it is right for us to do. Unfortunately in our world, respect for an individual and their uniqueness is low while respect for money is the highest.

The disastrous result is many people get lost along the way. They lose sight of what is most important to them, what makes them feel good about themselves, what fuels excitement about life, what gives them hope, teaches them perseverance, and rewards them with satisfaction.

Instead people fill their dissatisfying lives with everything that will never satisfy them because the one thing they want they deny themselves because of outside pressure that eventually becomes internalized.

Not only do individuals suffer, but so does everyone else. Social service, judicial and health care costs increase as does the dark element born of denying the essence of who we really are.

The journey back to me required years of unravelling the multiple layers a complicated life filled with much pain and trauma made even more difficult because of my unusual and severely misunderstood Personality Type. The Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI) psychological profiling tool recently pulled together all the bits and pieces of my painful fragmented life empowering me to finally heal on all levels.

Over twenty years ago, a glimpse of what I felt like inside I wrote in a little poem called Dusted Dreams. As I write this, I don’t have the poem with me right now because I am living in a shelter and two-thirds of my belongings are in storage at the last place I lived and worked. The poem’s imagery reveals the beginning of my quest to put myself back together again, to find again my hidden, buried dreams and my true self.

With all my fragments brought back into the light, making me whole again, I have finally been able to access the memory that when I was eight years old is when I knew I wanted to be a writer. I don’t know if I described myself that way, but I know I loved telling stories. I also know that is when the message that being a writer was not a real job. Real jobs were physical jobs with paychecks, not creating stories.

I am now 64 and the price I have paid for denying the essence of who I really am broke me financially several times, but first it broke my spirit to the point that I have lived most of my life depressed, angry, and resentful.

The MBTI, originally defined by one of the leaders of the science of psychology and philosophy, Carl Jung, explained that my Personality Type, an INFJ, as Introverted, Intuitive, Feeler, and Judger.

To put this information in context, in contrast to an Extrovert’s brain that requires continual external stimulation to stay engaged, an Introvert’s brain is highly stimulated internally, and as a result, can become overstimulated when around too many Extroverts or too much external stimulation of any kind. Hence, Introverts need to spend a lot of time alone to prevent over stimulation and exhaustion.

The Intuitive component of my Personality Type reveals I operate on intuition versus sensing the world as Sensors do. This quality also contributes to my living in my head more than people who live lives dominated by their physical senses.

Being a Feeler means being highly sensitive and emotional, which like any quality, has its good and bad aspects. Being attuned to emotions of myself and others makes me very empathetic and compassionate, yet without knowing for years how to balance experiencing the emotions and using their strength in a good way, I either repressed many of my emotions or let them fly in bouts of resentment and anger. These days I allow myself to just feel, not judge, the emotions, let them out safely, even if it means I may look weak or like a fool in front of others because now I know how to manage them once they have been identified and processed. The bonus is they certainly add to creating compelling writing.

Being a Judger, among other qualities results in my having excellent organizational talent, whether in performing tasks, in leadership that get things done, and/or to see the big picture, its implications, and details.

If you want to know more about the MBTI, I strong recommend the user-friendly books of Paul D. Tieger, Barbara Barron, and Kelly Tieger, consultants who have worked for years with organizations and education to help with recruiting and selection processes. They have also written several books, including one for parents to help them understand and to nurture their child’s uniqueness.

Now put back together, I see the writer I knew I was supposed to be. Am I that writer yet? No, but now I am studying different books to become her.

The other barrier I have had to accept is that by skipping all of grade nine, quitting high school in the middle of grade ten was not compensated for by my English studies in Business College or my essay writing in my first year of university. Though I achieved high 80’s in both, what pulled my marks down was my lack of English Standard knowledge and skill. I was also informed that I only received an Honourable Mention for Literature in a university-adjudicated short story contest because though my story was compelling my writing was not good enough.

Facing and accepting the limitations my injured spirit made, now I am learning from Robert W. Harris in his book Why Good People Write Bad Sentences: 12 St5eps to Better Writing Habits about how to dis-empower the impairing emotional and psychological baggage that developed because of the rejection, denial, and suppression of me as a writer. Clearing out what has been holding me back from becoming not only a healthy writer, but a great writer is restoring my spirit, confidence, and commitment.

Other books waiting to be absorbed are Write to the Point: A Master Class on the Fundamentals of Writing for Any Purpose by Sam Leith, Barron’s Grammar in Plain English, and my two favourite books, a dictionary and a thesaurus. It is also interesting to note that I gave up reading for fun because of people making fun of my love of words and that in grade school, spelling, along with arithmetic, were the two subjects I achieved 100% consistently.

One day, I will also bridge the gaps of mathematics knowledge I missed in high school so I can study abstract mathematics that I have held a fascination for as long as I can remember. In the meantime, my business mathematics will have to keep me satisfied while I focus on becoming the writer I knew I was supposed to be.

What about you?

KAITLIN ANN TREPANIER

Advocate Innovator Writer Social Entrepreneur & Founder

Connecting The Dots With The Respect Principle

Smashwords interview @  www.smashwords.com

© All Rights Reserved 2014-2019 

May 31, 2019

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Reshaping Our Thoughts, Words, and Actions Empowers Our Ability to Transform

When we realize, evidenced by the state of the world, there is a dominant negative influence shaping our thoughts, words, and actions, we are then empowered to transform ourselves and the state of the world with a powerful positive influence born of conscious choice.

KAITLIN ANN TREPANIER

Advocate Educator Writer Social Entrepreneur & Founder

Connecting The Dots With The Respect Principle

Smashwords interview @  www.smashwords.com

© All Rights Reserved 2014-2019 

March 14, 2019

 

KNOWLEDGE FREES US FROM Irrational Fears AND EMPOWERS US WITH Rational Fears To Be Prepared For The Risks

Let’s keep learning, growing, and becoming the best us we can be!

Kaitlin Ann Trepanier

CONNECTING THE DOTS WITH THE RESPECT PRINCIPLE

Founder Entrepreneur Author Artist and Speaker  

© All Rights Reserved 2018 

August 16, 2018                                  

NOTE: Kaitlin’s Smashwords interview and Ebooks available at www.smashwords.com

 

 

 

 

SEX EDUCATION and EMPOWERMENT for CHILDREN of the PRESENT

In 2015, Ontario’s Liberal Party and leader Kathleen Wynne introduced an updated-for-the-times sex-ed curriculum after consulting with the relevant professionals.

Doug Ford’s campaign promise to repeal the new sex-ed curriculum and return to the 1998 sex-ed is now done, but whom has the new Ontario Premier done it for?

His argument is that parents were not included in the new sex-ed content discussion, but what baffles me is the belief some people have that all children are taught by their parents, if they have parents, if they have functional, healthy parents. But what about the thousands of children who do not have someone to teach them? Are they just supposed to wing it like many of us did? Or what if those children actually have caretakers who are not providing the important information, for any reason. And what about children who are being exploited, abused, or even sexually abused by people they are supposed to trust … who are supposed to care for them?

As someone grievously injured by the lack of knowledge contained in the new sex-ed curriculum, that took years and a great deal of personal work to heal from the impact of not feeling I had the right to say “No” and the consequences of that dis-empowerment I am compelled to stand up for all children, especially those at risk.

In fact this very personal reason is one of my most compelling reasons for developing the “Connecting The Dots With The Respect Principle” concept, books, and materials for schools and communities. No child ever should be without the power of knowledge and without the power to say “No” or to ask for help, and get it, if they need it.

When I read the Georgina Advocate’s Editorial this past weekend “Reverting to 1998 Sex-Ed Curriculum Reckless” I knew I had to respond with the editor’s reasoning along with sharing my own painful history regarding consent.

The Editor’s key points were:

  1. “Reverting to the old curriculum will also delay the introduction of topics such as consent, which cannot be presented early enough given the sheer number of people who have come forward in recent memory to share stories of the assaults and inappropriate behaviors they have had to endure.” (Direct quote)
  2. The 1998 sex-ed curriculum was introduced one year before the legalization of same-sex marriage
  3. Technology as we know it now was in its infancy and therefore the 1998 curriculum did not mention how to deal with cyberbullying, sexting, and social media safety

I do appreciate people’s preferences to stick with what they know or what is considered traditional because they survived it, but why put children expose children to unnecessary and preventable pain and harm? That mindset does not help those living in the present who are trying to cope with the new challenges of the times. In fact, that mindset creates more risk through unpreparedness.

Instead,  we must move past our personal preferences and wants in order to best prepare children to live safe, healthy, functional lives. We need to educate all children in all ways, not just to become good employees, but to become good, healthy, functioning people realizing their unique potential for their benefit and the world’s benefit too.

However, since the 2015 sex-ed knowledge will no longer be accessible to children, I highly recommend Mayim Bialik, PhD’s book, Girling Up … How To Be Strong, Smart, and Spectacular, that I just finished reading myself. The scope and breadth of knowledge shared in a very user-friendly style is a great aid in moving successfully from childhood to adulthood. Bravo Mayim!

And wow, what a surprise to discover the Big Bang Theory’s awkward neurobiologist is actually a neuroscientist with two children of her own1

I wish books like Mayim’s had been available to me years ago, but we are never too old to learn, so please share the book with girls you care for. And yes, there is a boys’ version too.

Thank you for your open mind to embrace the changes of our times and empowering children to be better prepared for the challenges they face.

KAITLIN ANN TREPANIER

Human/Animal Rights Activist Social Scientist Founder Entrepreneur Author Artist

ORIGINALLY Connecting the Dots … with The Respect Principle ©All Rights Reserved since 2014

NOW Connecting The Dots With The Respect Principle ©All Rights Reserved 2018

July 24, 2018