Bad Behavior … Two Wrongs Don’t Make A Right

The challenge in choosing to respect … value every person results from the daunting task of seeing, disliking, and even hating bad behavior … yet not the person or humanity.

I know I struggled with this challenge most of my life like many people do because we are taught by experiences to do so … that is, until our Respect Level rises enough to see other humans as equal to us … in all their failings … and ours too.

There are those whose physiological makeup, their brain’s function, is impaired by natural chemical imbalances … natural mental health challenges, but a lot of mental health challenges are created by the world we live in and how we have shaped it by our choices of action or apathy … just going along for the ride.

Seen from the bigger picture perspective, we all make mistakes. Many people develop negative or blaming mentalities because to admit their own contribution may seem like a blow to what is often an over inflated ego… the kind developed and used to compensate for the unhealed wounds that still hurt.

I know because I lived that way too for most of my life … because I bought into the fallacy that my bad behavior, whether fueled by naivety, ignorance, disrespect, hurt, resentment, or anger, was who I was … someone bad … but I have learned we are all susceptible to bad behavior for a number of reasons, yet at the same time each and every one of us is a person … a human being … and what redeems us all is seeing beyond the bad behavior to help people in ways we can so they can develop the good behavior that results from feeling valued … respected regardless of the mistakes made … the bad behavior we manufacture.

And for any Christians reading this, we are called to forgive as many times as it takes, to help others get on the right track of good behavior by not adding another wrong on top of a wrong. It’s called love.

February 18, 2016

Kaitlin Ann Trepanier … The Respect Specialist, Humanitarian, Social Entrepreneur, Creative, and Writer. The company creates, publishes, and produces books, products, and services to free potential based on the concept and global initiative “Connecting the Dots … with The Respect Principle.” I look forward to discovering how I can help you and others unleash more potential for greater success, enhanced quality of life, more joy and peace!

Ebooks available at www.smashwords.com and other Ebook retailers.

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Oppression by physical violence … deadly, but spirit oppression by those who do not know they are oppressed …

We know oppression by physical violence is deadly, but often we are not aware of the more life-threatening oppression of people’s spirits by those who are not even aware they are oppressed and, as a result, cast their oppression onto those they are supposed to be “helping.”

Nowhere is this more prevalent than in those who are supposed to lead others into the future … whether the leader is a parent, teacher, principal, counsellor, minister, politician, or mentor of any kind … anyone in a position of authority.

How we can determine if we are being led by an “oppressed” leader is by their words and actions that seek to keep us small and limited based on their oppression … their own experience of being oppressed … being told by words and actions their dreams and goals were not possible and so took the path their own leaders told them to take … and they too became like their leaders … oppressed, bitter and jaded … passing on the legacy of oppression without even knowing it.

Over my lifespan, what was applauded in my life was my conformity to other people’s expectations, regardless of what I wanted. Just because I could do well what other oppressed people valued, did not mean I valued what I could do … and over time, the denial of what I knew I could do, with time, study and experimentation turned me into an oppressed, bitter and jaded person till I became so sick in the spirit I had no desire to live.

Interestingly enough, as my Respect Level has grown, I repeatedly have to stand up against, not the physical oppression, but the constant onslaught of the oppression of the unconscious … a “traditional” mentor who attempted to slay with sarcasm and dismissal that writing a book was not “real work,” which I gather he has never done because he would know how much work it is … an employment “counsellor” who also attempted to dismiss “creativity” as something wives of Bruce Power husbands do because they can afford to create at their leisure and at their husband’s expense.

As I wrote yesterday in, “If I knew then what I know now …” my few previous attempts to reclaim my own identity, gifts, talents and abilities have been met with an unexpected backlash of negativity and what I now recognize as the spirit oppression by those who too were spirit oppressed but still do not know it.

All of which fuels my passion even more to raise both individual and our global Respect Level because we know what to do with the oppressors who use violence physically … we return the same on them, but as of yet, on a mass level, we have not even recognized how we are passing on the oppression by the denial of its existence and its impact on our lives and the lives of those we lead by example.

To “oppress” means to weigh heavily on the mind, spirit or senses; to keep down by the cruel or unjust use of power; tyrannize over.

Being “oppressive” is distressing, not only physically but also mentally.

When any person takes on any role of leadership, guiding and mentoring others, what would serve everyone is simply the recognition of one’s own oppression, overcoming it and helping others to do the same … so they can rise to their potential … not be limited by oppression’s weight that attempts to keep people small, limited and powerless … because keeping people small, limited and powerless is also what drives our economy … keeping our wealth capped by the those who seek their false security by their control by oppression over other people … so they feel more valued … respected.

The problem is oppressors will never ever find the peace and wealth they crave … because peace and wealth are only born of the freedom to be who we really are as unique individuals discovering, developing and delivering to the world what only we have to offer.

Ironically, in the end, the oppressors are the ones who ultimately suffer the most by the legacy of oppression they pass on … for they will never be happy, satisfied, fulfilled … and wealthy in the way that counts most … in their spirit.

June 24, 2014

KAT (Kaitlin A. Trepanier)

All rights reserved by KAT (Kaitlin Ann Trepanier) and DARK HORSES PRODUCTIONS launching September 2014 … Entrepreneur, Creative Writer, Visual Artist, The RESPECT Specialist and Architect of the global initiative Connecting the Dots … with The RESPECT PRINCIPLE … because every child … every person … should know, by their own experience, they are valued … RESPECTED.

Difficult People … or Difficult World?

We have all met them. People who just rub us the wrong way … who get our back up … who we just want to say or do something to in order to let them know we do not like them, don’t approve of them, their choices, lifestyle … whatever.

In fact, as books, television, movies and the news show us, many of us even have family members we just can’t stand … and for some people their feelings about other family members even motivate them to commit crimes, even murder.

But are people being difficult for the sake of being difficult? Are people you consider difficult really difficult … or just different? And how much different?

In Connecting the Dots … with The RESPECT PRINCIPLE, my goal was to transform and provide a wealth of knowledge from the various fields of academic study and present them to our youth and to those who do not spend their time reading academic or even popular culture books.

As a result, one of the key components of the book presents the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI) … a psychological profiling tool used by organizations and high-level academic institutions to help them secure the people with the personality type, along with other factors, best required for the role they need filled. Initially proposed by Carl Jung, one of the two forerunners of psychology, the other being Sigmund Freud, Jung suggested there were several personality types and then later, the team of Myers-Briggs took his work and made it more accessible as a psychological assessment tool. Later, other teams, such as consultants Paul D. Tieger and Barbara Barron-Tieger made the psychological tool more accessible with their books Do What You Really Are and The Art of Speed Reading People.

The core of the MBTI is there are sixteen personality types, though primarily divided by two main key elements that are supported by other components. The key element defines how a person experiences the world as a result of the way their brain functions and processes information.

Introvert brains are highly stimulated internally and as a result, they require quieter, more removed from the mainstream work and living environments to thrive.

Extrovert brains have a much lower internal stimulus level and as a result, thrive when their environment, is bustling and filled with data their brains covert into knowledge.

You can read more about the MBTI in my book, Connecting the Dots … with The RESPECT PRINCIPLE or in the previous authors works, but for now, let’s just consider the accessible knowledge there are sixteen personality types, plus all the other influences of family, community, culture, financial status … plus what I call the Disrespect Philosophy that drives our unconscious conditioning, motivating us to think that a person should have to “earn or be awarded” respect … to be valued for just being a life.

Add religion, politics and the low RESPECT LEVELS of many people conditioned by the experience of being raised and living in a Disrespectful Philosophy-driven global culture and suddenly, it is easy to see it isn’t so much “difficult people” as it is a “difficult world.”

Difficult only though because one, we have been taught to not value others not like ourselves and two because, until now, we had not connected the dots to see each other differently from ourselves … and to accept not everyone has to be like us. Seeing “difficult” people through this new lens empowers us to positively change our thinking, our words and of course, our actions.

So what if we don’t like someone or approve of them? With our own increased awareness that boosts our own RESPECT LEVEL we learn our feelings or thoughts are not cause to hurt or harm with gossip, judgment, neglect or with physical violence. We learn we are just different and that difference is good, even great! Great because acknowledging our differences empowers us to more fully develop our differences, which is our potential, and as a result, to become more realized individuals … and citizens.

Difficult people? No. Just a difficult world shaped by the negative, limiting and harmful Disrespect Philosophy and supported by a lack of knowledge … till now.

June 4, 2014

Kaitlin A. Trepanier
http://www.kaitlinatrepanier.com

All rights reserved by KAITLIN A. TREPANIER/ DARK HORSES PRODUCTIONS … Creative Writer, Visual Artist and The RESPECT Specialist, architect of the global initiative Connecting the Dots … with The RESPECT PRINCIPLE … because every child … every person … should know, by their own experience, they are valued … RESPECTED.

Truth or Deception? I would not change a thing because …

Many of have heard people say or perhaps we have said the words ourselves, “I would not change a thing in my life because of what I have learned and the results in my life now.”

I used to believe this too, though now I call this thinking a fallacy because of a question that arose … does this kind of thinking empower us to make our world and the world-at-large a better place so we all thrive? Or are we just continuing to accept this hand-me-down mentality and passing its limitations onto the next generations?

After considering this mindset extensively I realize this perspective is yet another deception the Disrespect Philosophy creates to keep us small, with little expectation or hope, repeating the past over and over, instead of empowering us to create significant lasting personal and cultural change.

I will give you my scenario and hopefully as you read this, you will consider yours … from both perspectives.

For years I thought all the very limiting and negative experiences my life was filled with were my fault … including the abuses I experienced as a child … for being misunderstood, different, pre-judged, starving for acceptance and as a result, vulnerable to people who prey, consciously or not, on the vulnerability of the broken-hearted and the broken-spirited with promises that eventually caused me great harm … the dangerous kind of harm that reduces a child’s, a youth’s, an adult’s RESPECT LEVEL to such a low-level one keeps attracting the same level of disrespect from others … reinforcing and reducing one’s RESPECT LEVEL that turns what started out to be a happy, loving being into a negative, frightened being who seeks to hurt first in relationships or runs away or uses habits as distractions.

Then being forced to make changes to survive, I then embraced the idea that I had to go through all I did in life so I could do what I am doing … advocating, writing, creating; however, based on an idea that grew into the premise, Connecting the Dots … with The RESPECT PRINCIPLE. As a result, now I know for years I was being deceived by our global Disrespect Philosophy or if you are a Christian believer, as I am again, you would say it was the Enemy. Because I know this now, I also know this fallacy created yet another deception … another fallacy … the one that still wants me to believe and reinforce by saying, “I would not change a thing in my life because of what I have learned and the results in my life now.”

For now I see through this veil of deception imprisoning most of us.

For in truth, if we lived in a global culture of “Respect for all life,” based on The RESPECT PRINCIPLE, we would bring children into a world where we would have made the “Respect Full” changes to ensure all children would not have to qualify or be approved of in order to receive healthy food, shelter, clothing, medicine, education and if not love, at least RESPECT, the simple recognition that they, as the unique individuals they are, are valued … are valuable … just for being who they are.

In my case, if my parents, family, school, community, province and country had a high enough RESPECT LEVEL for those more different from themselves, they would have sought to discover what personality type I was, what were my primary and secondary communicating and learning styles, what type of learning environment I needed to develop my own identity, boundaries and a healthy RESPECT LEVEL for myself, and as a result, for others, thereby developing to the best ability the social skills to interact well with the world in all my relationships.

But they did not know my personality type thrives on study, research, exploration and then lots of analysis, introspection, problem solving, and creativity. They did not know my personality type’s mind receives vast internal stimulation whereas the majority of people require external stimulation from the world around them to keep them engaged mentally and that when I am in the external world too long, I shutdown to protect myself. But of course, the irony is, shutting down and withdrawing from those people whose brains require vast external stimulation often, because of ignorance, misjudge and mistreat those who withdraw, often taking their withdrawal personally, which ultimately puts those trying to protect themselves in more danger.

They did not know how their ignorance and their demand for 100% conformity broke my heart and my spirit as well as contributed to the harm to my body … inflicted by others and my self because of my low RESPECT LEVEL for myself.

And this is where many people will say, “But look at what you have learned, who you have become … a writer, author, advocate and so much more,” but I say this now, “But look at how much more I could have given to the world, at what a better citizen, student, role model, wife, daughter, sister, friend, supporter, community member I could have been all my life … if I knew from experience I was valued and aided accordingly for who I was and for my unique gifts, talents and abilities. I tell you who I would have been, what I would have done, the life I would have lived … I would have been placed in a Montessori school where self-directed education is best suited for my personality type. I would have received an athletic scholarship for the physical prowess and stamina I inherited from both of my parents. Because of my natural desire to study, I would have a few degrees, would be a lifelong successful author, an altruistic entrepreneur and so much more. I would not have married twice because I would have made better choices for me because I would have known myself better and not tried to get my value through other people whether in relationships or work I did. I would have been more respectful of others … their feelings, their things and I would have enjoyed happier and healthier relationships with my family.

Though this is my story, this is also everyone’s story … just look at our world.

Now that my years of study, research, analysis and problem-solving have revealed the lies and deceptions for what they are, now I am being who I was destined to be, doing what I was destined to do, life is good and my life will one day reflect that good … but if I had grown up in a world with a higher RESPECT LEVEL, my whole life would have bore the fruit of being who I really am … all my life and not just in the last half of my life … and the world I was in contact with during my lifetime would have been better for that experience.

If I could, I would change almost everything about my life, starting with my early years, where in photos I find a happy, joyful, exuberant child ready to explore the world, but since I cannot do it over for me, I am dedicated to shedding the light on the darkness … on the lies and deceptions the Disrespect Philosophy, the Enemy have used to hold us as prisoners.

I hope and pray you will too … it is never too late to be who you are meant to be.

February 17, 2014

Kaitlin A. Trepanier
http://www.kaitlinatrepanier.com

All Rights Reserved by DARK HORSES PRODUCTIONS/KAITLIN A. TREPANIER, Getting YOU the RESPECT YOU Want … Connecting the Dots … with The RESPECT PRINCIPLE Author, Writer, Playwright, Poet, Lyricist, Artist, Advocate, Speaker, Researcher, Analyst, Developer, Project Specialist, Creative Director, Founder … because every child … every person … should know, by their own experience, they are valued … RESPECTED.

Karma, Reaping What We Sow or Lifetime Prisoners to Disrespect Philosophy Thinking?

What if what is accepted as karma … getting back what you gave … reaping what you sow … really is a fallacy based on the Disrespect Philosophy, the premise no one or nothing is valuable unless some one or some group says so?

Not that I am suggesting karma or reaping what you sow does not happen … spiritually and scientifically, both are proven by research and personal experience, my own included.

What I am asking us all to reconsider is the long-term effect of believing as we do instead of recognizing that living in a world driven by the unconscious belief, the Disrespect Philosophy, we may experience karma or reaping what we sow … repeatedly, because when we don’t change our negative belief about the karma or what we reaped as only an effect … a temporary one … we become prisoners of such thinking and will continue to experience over and over and over the same karma … the same reaping … which will reinforce our negative thinking and the negative thinking and judgment of others about us … thereby constantly reinforcing the Disrespect Philosophy that keeps individuals, families, communities, cultures and nations, including our global nation, prisoners of a core belief that has imprisoned us, as history shows, for centuries.

Breaking free results from becoming aware of what one’s core beliefs are … as reflected by the results we generate … and then doing our work to change our thinking to generate new results by new actions … breaking the karmic and harvesting cycle of what we once sowed to reap the benefits of our new seeds.

The majority of us are driven by what has been driving humanity since the beginning of time whether you look at it from a spiritual perspective or from a rationale, intellectual, scientific perspective. The Bible calls Satan the deceiver … one who lies about who people are as children of God. The deceiver from a scientific, intellectual rationale perspective I call the Disrespect Philosophy, which as humankind’s history and presence show, we are to treat no one with respect unless we or someone else has decided such a person or group is worthy of being respected … valued.

The opposite, empowering, compassionate as well as logical and practical rationale is the Respect Philosophy, which I renamed as The RESPECT PRINCIPLE simply because a principle means a foundational or core belief. Recognizing the results we and the world generate based on our global unconscious belief is the first step. Raising one’s personal RESPECT LEVEL is the next step because when our own RESPECT LEVEL rises, as I have experienced firsthand, so do results we then generate, reflect our reaping new growth, breaking free of the karma from the negative thinking that has shaped our lives.

We all fall down because we all make mistakes … that is if we are living, taking chances and risks to keep learning and growing … which means sometimes we fall or fail. The Disrespect Philosophy or Satan, whatever your belief, will do their best to keep you down and imprisoned till what’s left of your life is but a shadow of what we can become … and I believe with all my heart that most of us are so much more than what we have come to believe … regardless of the how and why.

Today, I say to you … you are so much more. I know this because I have been a prisoner of a low RESPECT LEVEL for most of my life … valuing other people more than myself, putting their needs first … but I firmly believe we are all valuable in our own unique ways and that when we discover what those ways are, we create the best life for our self and therefore have our best self to share with the world … and that together, there is nothing that will stop us from finally breaking free so we can create a better world … the likes of which has not yet been seen in humanity’s time.

So, what is holding you prisoner? Or are you one of the fortunate few already free?

Regardless, bravo to you, for making the changes you need to be who you are destined to be!

February 15, 2014

Kaitlin A. Trepanier
http://www.kaitlinatrepanier.com

All Rights Reserved by DARK HORSES PRODUCTIONS/KAITLIN A. TREPANIER, Getting YOU the RESPECT YOU Want … Connecting the Dots … with The RESPECT PRINCIPLE Developer, Author, Speaker, Playwright, Altruistic Entrepreneur, and Human Rights Activist <strong … because every child … every person … should know, by their own experience, they are valued … RESPECTED.