SEX EDUCATION and EMPOWERMENT for CHILDREN of the PRESENT

In 2015, Ontario’s Liberal Party and leader Kathleen Wynne introduced an updated-for-the-times sex-ed curriculum after consulting with the relevant professionals.

Doug Ford’s campaign promise to repeal the new sex-ed curriculum and return to the 1998 sex-ed is now done, but whom has the new Ontario Premier done it for?

His argument is that parents were not included in the new sex-ed content discussion, but what baffles me is the belief some people have that all children are taught by their parents, if they have parents, if they have functional, healthy parents. But what about the thousands of children who do not have someone to teach them? Are they just supposed to wing it like many of us did? Or what if those children actually have caretakers who are not providing the important information, for any reason. And what about children who are being exploited, abused, or even sexually abused by people they are supposed to trust … who are supposed to care for them?

As someone grievously injured by the lack of knowledge contained in the new sex-ed curriculum, that took years and a great deal of personal work to heal from the impact of not feeling I had the right to say “No” and the consequences of that dis-empowerment I am compelled to stand up for all children, especially those at risk.

In fact this very personal reason is one of my most compelling reasons for developing the “Connecting The Dots With The Respect Principle” concept, books, and materials for schools and communities. No child ever should be without the power of knowledge and without the power to say “No” or to ask for help, and get it, if they need it.

When I read the Georgina Advocate’s Editorial this past weekend “Reverting to 1998 Sex-Ed Curriculum Reckless” I knew I had to respond with the editor’s reasoning along with sharing my own painful history regarding consent.

The Editor’s key points were:

  1. “Reverting to the old curriculum will also delay the introduction of topics such as consent, which cannot be presented early enough given the sheer number of people who have come forward in recent memory to share stories of the assaults and inappropriate behaviors they have had to endure.” (Direct quote)
  2. The 1998 sex-ed curriculum was introduced one year before the legalization of same-sex marriage
  3. Technology as we know it now was in its infancy and therefore the 1998 curriculum did not mention how to deal with cyberbullying, sexting, and social media safety

I do appreciate people’s preferences to stick with what they know or what is considered traditional because they survived it, but why put children expose children to unnecessary and preventable pain and harm? That mindset does not help those living in the present who are trying to cope with the new challenges of the times. In fact, that mindset creates more risk through unpreparedness.

Instead,  we must move past our personal preferences and wants in order to best prepare children to live safe, healthy, functional lives. We need to educate all children in all ways, not just to become good employees, but to become good, healthy, functioning people realizing their unique potential for their benefit and the world’s benefit too.

However, since the 2015 sex-ed knowledge will no longer be accessible to children, I highly recommend Mayim Bialik, PhD’s book, Girling Up … How To Be Strong, Smart, and Spectacular, that I just finished reading myself. The scope and breadth of knowledge shared in a very user-friendly style is a great aid in moving successfully from childhood to adulthood. Bravo Mayim!

And wow, what a surprise to discover the Big Bang Theory’s awkward neurobiologist is actually a neuroscientist with two children of her own1

I wish books like Mayim’s had been available to me years ago, but we are never too old to learn, so please share the book with girls you care for. And yes, there is a boys’ version too.

Thank you for your open mind to embrace the changes of our times and empowering children to be better prepared for the challenges they face.

KAITLIN ANN TREPANIER

Human/Animal Rights Activist Social Scientist Founder Entrepreneur Author Artist

ORIGINALLY Connecting the Dots … with The Respect Principle ©All Rights Reserved since 2014

NOW Connecting The Dots With The Respect Principle ©All Rights Reserved 2018

July 24, 2018

 

 

 

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Since Knowledge Is Power, Why Would Anyone, Including Ontario Candidate Doug Ford, Want To Take It Away From Children?

While listening to radio chatter the other day about the upcoming provincial election, the one thing that grabbed my attention was Doug Ford’s comment he would eradicate the new sex education curriculum installed by Liberal Kathleen Wynne.

Now, personally I am a Liberal because I believe in progression and taking all people into consideration and ensuring fairness, especially for those less fortunate. I don’t believe in tradition for the the sake of tradition alone because a lot of things traditionally have empowered some people  to harm others and to get away with inflicting that harm … on  vulnerable people with intellectual disabilities, impoverished people, women, some men, teens, children, ethnic people, people with visible differences, people in subordinate positions, people with different beliefs, etc.

Therefore, as someone sexually abused, bullied, beaten physically and psychologically as a child, teen, and adult, plus manipulated by tradition to respect my elders and say nothing, I applauded Wynne’s efforts to provide children and teens the knowledge about what sex is, when it’s appropriate, and how to be able to stand up against anyone … another child, teen, or adult … who tries to do something to them they do not want.

Yes, it’s awkward talking about sex, but it is more awkward talking about the after effects of being sexually engaged without consent when no one wants to talk about sex.

Yes, the subject may seem inappropriate to some religious beliefs, but one must question if one’s religious beliefs allow children to be taken advantage of and harmed, is it not more beneficial to the child to have the sex education knowledge and be safe and later for them to learn about and choose their own beliefs when they are capable of making their own religious/spiritual choices.

Children are enraptured by what they are told is off limits. Yet children’s curiosity is satisfied by the facts of what is happening to their bodies and what sex is, confirmed by the results some cultures are discovering when children are educated. Interestingly enough, once their curiosity is satisfied, they leave the subject of sex alone until they are ready to explore further at a later age.

Imagine the possibilities … less child pornography, less children and teens sexually abused, less children and teens being trafficked, less children psychologically damaged and passing on their damage to others, less children with sexually transmitted diseases, less unwanted pregnancies, etc.

Imagine all the money and resources that can be saved from not having to save, care for, heal, and restore all those broken by the lack of empowerment because of the lack of knowledge about sex.

Yes, I know the Liberal Party has other issues to tackle, such as hydro’s catastrophic rates that are forcing people to choose between rent, food, and heat, etc., but in comparison to all the other issues, always, my first priority is protecting and saving the children.

What is your priority?

May 10, 2018

KAITLIN ANN TREPANIER

Human/Animal Rights Activist Social Scientist Founder Entrepreneur Author Artist

Connecting The Dots With The Respect Principle

©All Rights Reserved 2015

 

 

 

 

 

ASS/U/ME … Why the Word and Action Got Such a Bad Name

Over 7 billion people live on the earth … and each one is a unique blend of gifts, talents, and abilities that are shaped by their experiences and that turn into the beliefs … conscious ones or subconscious ones.

Assumptions are our thoughts about something or someone … they are something taken for granted … something assumed, but not proven. (Oxford Paperback Dictionary).

Even with the definition alone, is to easy to comprehend how assumptions can get us and our relationships into a lot of trouble through misunderstanding and our perspectives.

Now, multiply that scenario by 7 billion people and it becomes even easier to see why the action of “assuming” often results in making an “ass” out of “u” and “me.”

Narrowing down the 7 million to 16 personality types, such as the Myers Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI) that is based on Carl Jung’s work, plus their experiences and beliefs is still a major challenge to contend with in trying to have respectful, peaceful, and supportive relationships.

To further narrow down perspective, Paul and Barbara-Barron Tieger’s research revealed that the majority of the US population is dominated by the “E”xtrovert personality type that thrives on a high level of interaction with others like themselves. The other smaller portion of the population is an “I”ntroverted type whose brain requires regular quiet and solitude to manage their high internally-stimulated brains.

As you can deduce, all these, and many other complications can make for very difficult relationships when we take for granted that people experience the world in the same way we do, that people think about the world in the same way we do, and react in the same way … assuming without proving their assumptions.

For example, in my family, as with many other families, I am the one more different than the majority. Depending on who you talk to in a family, some are called “black sheep” with the connotation that the others are white and therefore good, some are called odd ducks, weird, crazy … and well, you get the picture.

It doesn’t matter what personality type the majority are, what matters to “the pack” is that the one outside “the pack” is seen as different … and differences, in packs with low “Respect Levels” … be they families or any collection of people brought together in some way … are not only seen as different, they are deemed problematic … even dangerous.

Teasing, tormenting, shunning, ostracizing, and casting out the different one is usually the first step, though sometimes physical harm is also used as a way to vent fear and to try and control the one being cast to the outside.

I was a bold little child, albeit quite often alone or leading when with others. An avid learner, I was an “A” student from the getgo until the factory education model of everybody learning and being the same created havoc for me. School became less and less fun, dominated not by learning, but by the ridicule experienced for being bored in class and by not being in the major packs in the school yards. Even teachers back then did not know what to do and resorted to punitive psychological, as well as physical punishments.

With the lack of understanding by the masses of personality types and low “Respect Levels” for those more different from the majority, the teasing, tormenting, shunning, ostracizing, and casting out continue and for some with more drastic consequences … such as the loss of their life … by their own or a “pack’s” hands.

Extroverts are quick to point their fingers at “loners” as threats, but the ignorance and lack of acceptance of differences between Extroverts and Introverts fuels the erroneous assumption that all loners … Introverts … are dangerous … demonstrating the truth they are taking something … someone for granted … without proof … that’s what beliefs on ignorance and untruths do.

The interesting contrary thing is that though there are some loners, often broken by the societal rejection, who then set out to harm others … more loners … Introverts … especially broken ones … often become easy targets and prey for both Introverts … and Extroverts.

To stay safe, Introverts will even transform themselves enough to be accepted into the pack, but unfortunately, with this transformation, they often give up too much of their true selves and a price will have to be paid by them at some point … for me, it was a fierce internal boil of anger at others for not being acceptable, for forcing me to be what they wanted by their mind games, and my own anger at myself for giving in and giving up on myself … all of which I mostly displayed with sarcasm, a cutting tongue and wit … a constant stream of intense negative energy and the need to be better … perfect even … all of which was so far removed from the tender-hearted compassionate soul broken by so much cruelty at a young age.

Extroverts dominate our world, creating a lot of noise and busyness for them to thrive … and Introverts are often just trying to live in the peace and quiet they need to thrive … and sometimes, both even meet in the middle … and we can do so more successfully to create a better world … if we stop assuming one is better than the other … one is more right … one is more … whatever.

Extroverted activity makes things happen, but it is Introverted creation that give the Extroverts much of what they need to keep the world moving forward.

When we learn and accept this knowledge instead of making assumptions based on our own limited experiences and knowledge, much of the pain, frustration, bitterness, resentment, fear, prejudice, ostracization, and violence will diminish … and we will move into a new realm of co-existence not yet experienced in humanity.

And maybe one day, my siblings will see me differently, as I am learning to see them differently too … and all siblings and only children will too … and forgiveness, acceptance, peace, and respect will strengthen our relationships with each other … as it is strengthening the relationship with myself, healing the scars from years of cruel rejection and the backlash it created in me and my actions … and in so many of us. Till then, the realized benefit is how learning this is transforming me … softening my edges … replacing my pain and anger with respect and even love … the unconditional kind.

Awesome stuff is “Connecting the Dots … with The RESPECT PRINCIPLE” because even if you don’t need to learn it, I certainly did … because the benefits are of the positive, life-altering kind. And then when you add God’s unconditional love that I have been studying particularly this past year … anything is indeed possible!

Thanks for dropping by one of 7 billion!

April 15, 2015

KAITLIN A. TREPANIER

Freeing “Potential” with Education, Entertainment, and Inspiration with the global initiative and core book Connecting the Dots … with The RESPECT PRINCIPLE … because every child … every person … should know, by their own experience, they are valued … RESPECTED.

© All rights reserved 2014.