Perspective on “Respect and Love” From World-Renowned Psychologist Alice Miller and …

“I love my children if I can respect them with all their feelings and their needs and try to fulfill those needs as best as I can. If I see them not as persons whose rights are just as sacrosanct as my own, but as objects that I have to correct, then that is not love.”

Free From Lies Discovering Your True Needs, Alice Miller, p 223

“Most parents don’t want to hurt their children; they do it automatically, by repeating that they themselves learned when they were small. We can help them to refrain from this destructive behavior by explaining to them why it is so destructive. Then they can wake up and make a choice.”

Free From Lies Discovering Your True Needs, Alice Miller, p 240

The introduction and study of Alice Miller’s body of work changed and played a big role in healing my life. Fueled by my deep compassion for all people, what I learned about respect and love from Alice Miller inspired my development of the Connecting The Dots With The Respect Principle concept, company, books, products, services, and global initiative. My compassion and respect for everyone, plus my understanding of what needs to change in our world drives me every day to keep moving forward with this body of work that will hopefully help many others as Alice helped so many too.

April 14, 2018

KAITLIN ANN TREPANIER

Human/Animal Rights Activist Social Scientist Founder Entrepreneur Author Artist

Connecting The Dots With The Respect Principle

©All Rights Reserved 2015

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“You Want Them To Treat Your Choice With Enough Respect To …”

Quote from Art Markman’s Harvard Business Review article, “When You Have to Carry Out a Decision You Disagree With”

Read the whole article by clicking on the link below …

https://hbr.org/2018/02/when-you-have-to-carry-out-a-decision-you-disagree-with

February 12, 2018

 KAITLIN ANN TREPANIER

Founder President Author Speaker Artist

Connecting The Dots With The Respect Principle

©All Rights Reserved 2015

 

“The Most Important Factor in a Relationship is Not Communication, But Respect”

As an author and creative myself, I don’t want to infringe on another’s copyright, but the thing is, in this case, I visited Mark Manson’s site to read his original article, but frankly, though I appreciate the wisdom shared about long-lasting healthy relationships, as creator of the “Respect Scale” as part of my concept, book, company, and global initiative, I had a lot to learn about respect also.

As a result of what I have learned and embraced, I am put off reading Mark’s article because of the title of his book. The reason is a higher “Respect Level” translates into not using profanity or other means to put down other people, but to live and let live without judgment and/or condemnation.

On that note, because of the disrespect I received and therefore dished out until I learned new ways to interact with people, I’m going to share Justin Brown’s post instead and let people choose which author’s article they prefer to read because overall, I do find the insights and wisdom helpful as I work on further developing my relationship skills.

Click below to read Justin Brown’s article and click inside the article to go to Mark Manson’s version.

https://ideapod.com/every-successful-relationship-successful-10-exact-reasons/

Thanks for writing and sharing Justin and Mark.

More validation of why you want more respect in your life … to give and receive. Learn how by visiting your favorite ebook retailer and reading one or more of the Connecting The Dots With The Respect Principle books. Stay tuned for two more ebooks in the works, Broken People Break People and Respect … The Way Back Into Love.

February 8, 2018

KAITLIN ANN TREPANIER

Founder President Author Speaker Artist

Connecting The Dots With The Respect Principle

©All Rights Reserved 2015

RESPECT … as a PRINCIPLE

A principle is defined as a universal truth … a foundation to build upon.

Respect as a principle is a global initiative delivering the good news every person … every life is valuable.

How we treat what is valuable reflects our “Respect Level” for ourselves, others, and life.

And to co-create a better world, we simply need to raise our “Respect Level.”

Learn more in the upcoming ebook, Connecting The Dots With The Respect Principle … The Why, The How, and The Benefits releasing January 1st 2018!

KAITLIN ANN TREPANIER

Founder President Author Speaker Artist

Connecting The Dots With The Respect Principle

©All Rights Reserved 2015

December 18, 2017

 

Restore Respect to Restore Hope

Sometimes before we can believe in hope, we have to first have to believe that we, the unique individuals we each are, are valuable for simply being a life … a person.

One of the best ways I finally discovered to truly believe in my own worth … not as a person more important than others, but certainly no longer less important … was connecting the dots with the idea, what I named the Respect Principle, that every person should know by their own experience, they are valued … respected … because when a person does not know this a series of events turn into experiences with the potential to send people on a downward spiral, as it did me for several years.

To compensate for a very low Respect Level, for myself and as a result for others, my ego, supported by defensiveness and at times, indignation, prevented me seeing how I was repeating the pattern of acting with a low Respect Level towards myself and others … sabotaging my own life and success.

Since developing the Connecting the Dots … with The Respect Principle concept, a deep internal shift occurred in me, which I am extremely grateful for; however, the shift did not result in my thoughts and behavior mirroring my new beliefs right away. Just the other day I was challenged by someone. At first, the old responses arose. First fear, then indignation and finally the realization that because of my fear, I had tried to control a situation that would have been better resolved respectfully to both parties if I had controlled my fear instead and acted accordingly.

Fortunately, I can see things clearly because of my higher Respect Level and for the others involved and can apologize with the sincerity from the heart and not just the mouth.

The concept of seeing the big picture, connecting the dots of humanity, through the lens of the Respect Principle is what has instilled new hope in my heart because of the possibilities. The simple idea of everyone being treated the same … as valuable … entitled to respect … just for being a person, whether I like, agree with or identify with them in some way is so inspiring my life is now dedicated to the goal of sharing the vision and experience with others.

Now for some people, this evolution of raising one’s Respect Level may be enough once the results yield more positive versus negative results; however, I discovered I was still hungry for something more. As wonderful as life was becoming because I was increasingly being filled with the ability to value … respect myself and others, I realized I wanted more.

And the more was love.

Not the conditional kind many people experience, where people only “love” us when we do what they want, act like they want, etc., but the kind with no qualifiers or disclaimers. The kind of love I found only when I looked beyond the physical world to the spiritual world.

For me, raised and broken by Catholicism’s teachings and people’s misunderstandings or ignorance of the Bible teachings, I had walked away from religion, believing in God, as well as believing in people or myself. Even when I tried to fill the voids created by the low Respect Level and conditional love, other religions and other philosophies still left me hungry and unsatisfied.

With a high enough Respect Level, I realized I was empowered to choose what spiritual belief I wanted to explore. For me, the choice was to return to Christianity to discover if what I had been taught was the truth or some people’s interpretation. I wanted to be able to choose if I wanted to accept the Christian faith or if I needed to keep searching.

Studying an amplified Bible on my own with the help of television teachers, for me, has resulted in my choice to be a Christian in words and actions because of the peace the faith provides, but what matters for all of us is when we are filled up with a high enough Respect Level to function and even thrive, we also eventually need a spiritual belief that inspires us to evolve higher as the spiritual beings we all are, even when, or especially when, the people around us do not.

Each and every one of us is a unique being with our unique combination of gifts, talents, and abilities. Christianity also agrees by the teaching we each have our own unique race to run as a human being.

Regardless of what you may think or believe now, I know from experience, and I hope you will discover for yourself, that respect does restore hope … and hope restores our sense of wonder as being spiritual beings living a human life.

Kaitlin Ann Trepanier, The Respect Specialist

Restore Respect to Restore Hope

April 19, 2016

800 words

Kaitlin Ann Trepanier … The Respect Specialist, Humanitarian, Social Entrepreneur, Publisher, Author, Creative, Speaker, and Developer of core concept, The Respect Principle, and the global initiative, Respect for All. Stalled for a few years, the restarted company designed as a for-profit to meet the social need develops and delivers books, products, and services that educate, entertain, and inspire the positive changes needed for the vision of Respect for All.

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