2020 Marks 25th Anniversary

This April marks the most important anniversary of my life.

No, the anniversary is not a wedding anniversary, which for some people can sometimes just be a marker of time, rather than a celebration of love or a work anniversary.

Instead, for me, this 25th anniversary marks something more important than a passage of time to me–it marks the year when unconditional love cracked opened my hardened heart.

A multitude of reasons, since I was a child, shutdown my ability to love unconditionally, which you will be able to read about in my upcoming book, Carpenter’s Daughter, but that is not the point of today’s story.

Instead, the point of today’s story focuses on the time and place of meeting someone who served as the final catalyst that thrust me into the life I was destined to live, rather than the life I was living to get and keep people’s approval, plus to feel safe and protected.

The circumstances; the timing, the place, and the person all came together perfectly. A self-discovery journey had revealed my passion, writing, especially to help, inspire, and motivate people to discover and realize their unique potential, healing them through the process.

A husband and other people in my life who did not approve or like the changes I was making to our lives, revealed a hunger for approval and to be liked for who I really was and was working to reclaim.

Admittedly, I was prone to running away from problems because when I was younger I had not developed the relationship skills I needed for healthy relationships, but that was changing from the personal work I was doing, in part, catalyzed by a year and a half working with a psychologist to deal with trauma resulting from my formative years and my determination to become the best version of myself.

How much work I had yet to do revealed itself when I met him.

An Easter Monday in April was the mark of passage. My first day on a new job, a three-day-a-week  contract merchandising job for a souvenir company resulted in my standing in a line up of warehouse workers awaiting their direction from a small Asian man. Dismissed from the early morning meeting, we broke from our line, and that is when I saw him.

Well, it was not so much as seeing a tall, lean man walk in another direction from where I was stationed for my training, but a tingly sense in my gut, invoking the words in my head, “Oh no, I am in trouble.”

I had no idea what these words would really mean over time, how my life was going to be affected, and altered beyond expectations.

Of course, first came the final destruction of the life I had been living and knew in my heart I had to leave. And sadly the destruction of the good reputation I had established as a hard worker that previously exceeded expectations

In other words, I made an absolute fool of myself.

For a variety of reasons, healthy boundaries were not something I had learned or developed over the years. Plus, the traumas I had experienced made me very skittish, pushing me away from what I knew was an incredible thing because I was afraid I thought meeting might be my total undoing, while also compelling me to act compulsively, though not in good ways.

The net result was a lot of confusion and pain that clouded incredible clarity and joy. Suddenly, several years later, all the players in this drama were living their separate distant lives.

As time went by, the confusion and pain ebbed and faced, but not the clarity and joy. As if yesterday, I remembered, rediscovered and reclaimed the unconditional love I experienced during the times we spent together working or hanging out: the unconditional love I have finally learned to give myself and others, further made possible by the ever-present unconditional love I am experiencing these days as I study the Bible and accept God’s unconditional love.

No, the man, whose soul reached into mine and helped bring me back to life, is not with me physically, yet he always deep within me, which is why I am writing today to say “Thank you” for being the perfect person at the perfect time for my return to love.

So, Happy 25th Anniversary to me and to the man who was a crucial catalyst on my healing journey. I hope your life now is all your heart and soul needs it be for you to thrive too.


Specialist Writer Speaker Social Entrepreneur Founder and President

of Connecting The Dots With The Respect Principle

Smashwords interview @  www.smashwords.com

© All Rights Reserved 2014-2020

January 18, 2020









MEET the UNEXPECTED LEADERS of Wildlife Restoration and Conservation

“It’s amazing … with limited budgets and widespread poverty, [Native American tribes] are the leader in wildlife restoration when compared to the state wildlife agency … “

Get the details by reading the full article. Click on the following link …


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Innovator Author Artist Social Entrepreneur and Founder

Connecting The Dots With The Respect Principle


Smashwords interview @  www.smashwords.com

© All Rights Reserved 2014-2018

December 17, 2018


Restore Respect to Restore Hope

Sometimes before we can believe in hope, we have to first have to believe that we, the unique individuals we each are, are valuable for simply being a life … a person.

One of the best ways I finally discovered to truly believe in my own worth … not as a person more important than others, but certainly no longer less important … was connecting the dots with the idea, what I named the Respect Principle, that every person should know by their own experience, they are valued … respected … because when a person does not know this a series of events turn into experiences with the potential to send people on a downward spiral, as it did me for several years.

To compensate for a very low Respect Level, for myself and as a result for others, my ego, supported by defensiveness and at times, indignation, prevented me seeing how I was repeating the pattern of acting with a low Respect Level towards myself and others … sabotaging my own life and success.

Since developing the Connecting the Dots … with The Respect Principle concept, a deep internal shift occurred in me, which I am extremely grateful for; however, the shift did not result in my thoughts and behavior mirroring my new beliefs right away. Just the other day I was challenged by someone. At first, the old responses arose. First fear, then indignation and finally the realization that because of my fear, I had tried to control a situation that would have been better resolved respectfully to both parties if I had controlled my fear instead and acted accordingly.

Fortunately, I can see things clearly because of my higher Respect Level and for the others involved and can apologize with the sincerity from the heart and not just the mouth.

The concept of seeing the big picture, connecting the dots of humanity, through the lens of the Respect Principle is what has instilled new hope in my heart because of the possibilities. The simple idea of everyone being treated the same … as valuable … entitled to respect … just for being a person, whether I like, agree with or identify with them in some way is so inspiring my life is now dedicated to the goal of sharing the vision and experience with others.

Now for some people, this evolution of raising one’s Respect Level may be enough once the results yield more positive versus negative results; however, I discovered I was still hungry for something more. As wonderful as life was becoming because I was increasingly being filled with the ability to value … respect myself and others, I realized I wanted more.

And the more was love.

Not the conditional kind many people experience, where people only “love” us when we do what they want, act like they want, etc., but the kind with no qualifiers or disclaimers. The kind of love I found only when I looked beyond the physical world to the spiritual world.

For me, raised and broken by Catholicism’s teachings and people’s misunderstandings or ignorance of the Bible teachings, I had walked away from religion, believing in God, as well as believing in people or myself. Even when I tried to fill the voids created by the low Respect Level and conditional love, other religions and other philosophies still left me hungry and unsatisfied.

With a high enough Respect Level, I realized I was empowered to choose what spiritual belief I wanted to explore. For me, the choice was to return to Christianity to discover if what I had been taught was the truth or some people’s interpretation. I wanted to be able to choose if I wanted to accept the Christian faith or if I needed to keep searching.

Studying an amplified Bible on my own with the help of television teachers, for me, has resulted in my choice to be a Christian in words and actions because of the peace the faith provides, but what matters for all of us is when we are filled up with a high enough Respect Level to function and even thrive, we also eventually need a spiritual belief that inspires us to evolve higher as the spiritual beings we all are, even when, or especially when, the people around us do not.

Each and every one of us is a unique being with our unique combination of gifts, talents, and abilities. Christianity also agrees by the teaching we each have our own unique race to run as a human being.

Regardless of what you may think or believe now, I know from experience, and I hope you will discover for yourself, that respect does restore hope … and hope restores our sense of wonder as being spiritual beings living a human life.

Kaitlin Ann Trepanier, The Respect Specialist

Restore Respect to Restore Hope

April 19, 2016

800 words

Kaitlin Ann Trepanier … The Respect Specialist, Humanitarian, Social Entrepreneur, Publisher, Author, Creative, Speaker, and Developer of core concept, The Respect Principle, and the global initiative, Respect for All. Stalled for a few years, the restarted company designed as a for-profit to meet the social need develops and delivers books, products, and services that educate, entertain, and inspire the positive changes needed for the vision of Respect for All.

© www.therespectprinciple.com All Rights Reserved.  









“And the Lord turned the captivity of Job (from the enemy) and restored his fortunes when he prayed for (and forgave) his friends; also the Lord gave Job twice as much as he had before.” Job 42:10

Three times I was righteous, in right standing with God … first as a baptized child, and then later, twice in my life when I sought to change … to do what was in my heart to do … to help people in the way my unique inherent and learned gifts, talents, and skills would allow … to do the right thing.

However, my differences as a child set me apart from the flock because of the flock’s misunderstanding and condemnation of those not mirroring back their own images. Without respect … being valued as a unique individual … like any child hungry for acceptance and safety, I turned to those who were also broken early and rejected, though, because of their own pain from their experiences, they took advantage of me … and taught me to do the same.

In my early thirties, I attempted to return to being righteous, but much had happened … things I had done … things done to me … so that even when the door opened and I walked through, the loneliness along with the additional condemnation overwhelmed me to the point I walked … ran away from everyone and everything, even that which had been good, even turning away that which felt right, like what I was supposed to be doing … writing to help people.

In my fifties, a final attempt rose up from deep inside to do right … to be righteous, but once again, I was shocked by the negative backlash, even though intellectually I knew there should be no reason for the shock because my research, studies, and analysis had clearly revealed the answer from both a scientific and a spiritual perspective.

But it has been in the past year, that I discovered Job and his story. Though he had been righteous all his life, God allowed the enemy to test and try him, taking away all that was good and bountiful in his life, which I felt like had been done to me too, but the difference between Job and myself was our attitudes. He had faith, never lost hope, trusted God … me, not so much. Not for most of my life anyway.

Though I had heard of Job the past few years, the hardships he endured … everything taken away from him … I had not yet read his story in The Bible, but yesterday, the page The Bible flipped open to was the ending of Job’s story and here I found the above passage.

Reading the end of Job’s story also revealed why I have lost so much … being tested, tried, and prepared for positive change, while mistakenly myself, along with many others, thought I had lost so much because I was a horrible person, unrighteous, made too many mistakes, and was reaping what I had sown.

For some time, the more honest, truthful, and full of integrity I grew, the more things got worse. I was frustrated that by doing all the right things, persecution seemed to rain upon, and even flood my life at times. And then the story of Job arrived and I understand what has happened and why.

As a result, with a new ability created by the new levels of respect, peace, and love to forgive all, I know I shall reap like Job now that I too have been freed. Perhaps the Lord will also bless me too more in the latter days of my life than He did in the beginning because of my commitment to doing the right things I am to do … now matter how long it has taken me and how many tries before I persevered and succeeded.

Perhaps when people read Job’s story and mine, DARK HORSES, they too will discover that reaping what we sow is not entirely in our hands, as any farmer or gardener will tell you. Stuff happens that we cannot control or even influence. Yet, as I am discovering, all things are possible when we believe in something more than just ourselves.

July 23, 2015


Freeing “Potential” with Education, Entertainment, and Inspiration with the global initiative and core book Connecting the Dots … with The RESPECT PRINCIPLE because every child … every person … should know, by their own experience, they are valued … RESPECTED.

http://www.therespectprinciple.com © All rights reserved 2014.