FATHERS and MOTHERS … Recognize everyone gets hurts as children and teens, so healing our hurts before becoming parents is the best way to prevent our children from becoming mean, abusive, and/or violent

Because of circumstances I did not know how to handle as a young teen, I dropped out of school to marry at sixteen someone who would save me. No children involved.

The violence started verbally, then grew increasingly physical to the point of a brutal, violent rape … all this suffered at the hands of a a handsome, charming, yet jealous and insecure man, who was made sterile by his father’s physical attack on him at fourteen when he stepped in to stop the assault on his mother after his dad pushed her down the stairs.

Years later, after a second non-physically abusive marriage and subsequent divorce, I briefly dated a fellow also very broken by his childhood experiences, but when his circumstances became dire I offered to share an apartment so we could both get on our feet financially. But, as time rolled on, verbal abuse became the norm, until one day he threw something and almost hit my little cat. I realized it was time to get out. He was also dating a married woman and I was also concerned about becoming collateral damage if an angry husband showed up.

Continued after video …

 

Learning I was attracting such partners because of my own brokenness and my resulting willingness to accept such treatment came from understanding I needed to learn how to respect myself enough to not just walk away when in danger, but to heed the signs before getting involved with other low “Respect Level” people. Not that I won’t help them, but I no longer need to be in a personal or professional relationship with them.

I also know too, we can’t help people who don’t want help … all we can do is model what self-respect and respect for others looks like, and if necessary, contact the people who can help in ways we cannot.

Please share my story because it may just be what someone needs to read for them to be safe.

PLEASE NOTE: If you are in an abusive relationship of any kind, do not act defiant. Be smart. Be respectful of your own life and those in your care by seeking help in your community from people who can be trusted.

Thank you.

Sincerely,

KAITLIN ANN TREPANIER

Human/Animal Rights Activist Social Scientist Founder Entrepreneur Author Artist

Connecting The Dots With The Respect Principle

©All Rights Reserved 2015

 

 

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The Inspiration … Phrases, Quotes, Statistics

Connecting the Dots … with The RESPECT PRINCIPLE … because every child … every person … should know by their own experience … they are valued … RESPECTED.

“Violence causes more than 1.6 million deaths worldwide every year and is one of the leading causes of death in all parts of the world for persons 15 – 44.” www://cdc.gov 12/18/14

RESPECT transforms the quality of life.

“More than 1 billion children (1/7 of the world’s population) and half of all the children in the world are victims of violence every year.” www.//cdc.gov 12/18/14

CONNECT … with RESPECT! because RESPECT simply means “to value”

“In every country surveyed, more than 1 in 4 girls experienced sexual violence.” www.//cdc.gov 12/18/14

RESPECT is not something a child … teen … adult … senior … should have to earn.

“More than 3 million referrals received by state and local agencies each year. 6 referrals every minute for maltreatment of children … physically … sexually … emotionally … plus because of neglect. Total lifetime cost of child maltreatments is $124 billion per year.” www.//cdc.gov 12/18/14

Want a better world? … be a more “respect-full” person.

“Depression is the leading cause of disability worldwide and a major contributor to global burden of disease. 350 million affected. Can lead to suicide … suicides estimated to be 1 million per year.”
www://who.intl 12/18/14

December 18, 2014

KAITLIN A. TREPANIER
The RESPECT SPECIALIST … Freeing “Potential” with Education, Entertainment, and Inspiration!

CONNECT … with RESPECT! ORDER Connecting the Dots … with The RESPECT PRINCIPLE … because every child … every person … should know, by their own experience, they are valued … RESPECTED. © All rights reserved 2014.

Dynamic Duo! Connecting the Dots … with The RESPECT PRINCIPLE and Suze Orman’s The MONEY CLASS

It does not matter how much money we make, without a high enough RESPECT LEVEL, we will still spend more than we make. Speaking from experience and the debt statistics, especially credit card debt and mortgage debt, many of us have at times acted like children given a free rein in a candy shop … ultimately making ourselves sick by not having a high enough RESPECT LEVEL empowering us to make good financial decisions … forcing us to feel sick to our stomach, either from all the junk we have eaten or because of the overdue bills that keep arriving in our mailbox.

Even after achieving Honours in Business Administration at age twenty-nine, I still did not get it. What I did get was a much better income and because conditioned ways of thinking about money and debt were still rooted in my mind, I also generated a lot more debt … because that is what we do, so the statistics stories say is true.

Even when I wanted to change my lifestyle and career to set my life on a better course doing what I wanted to do, the old way of thinking was still rooted deep in me and I made many more not-so-great choices that negatively affected my life and the lives of many others.

And even a few years ago, though my RESPECT LEVEL had risen some because of my dedicated efforts, I realized too late I was still facing the same foe … and though I had been free and clear of debt for years, back on the same horse I climbed and piled up debt once again that I have to get out of again.

But this time, to the rescue came an increasing RESPECT LEVEL for myself and others and a determination to break the bonds of such low thinking. One important tool aiding the mindset change is the wealth of knowledge Suze Orman provides in her 2010 book, The Money Class.

Near the end of her book, Suze’s comment that reading her book may have felt like an intense university course was right on the mark. Her book, The Money Class, is a valuable resource and guide that I studied by writing copious notes because I remember the most effectively and efficiently when I write things out. To my studies, I brought a very open and eager mind desiring to learn how to be different when it comes to my relationship with money, a willingness to acknowledge I did not know everything about money management, and in fact, the admission there was a lot I did not know, from teaching children how to manage money, to funding their college funds, when to start saving for retirement and how, plus what kind of insurance to buy for one’s lifetime.

Suze is a kind, compassionate, yet a firm teacher as her core philosophy shows: People first, money second, things third.

For years, because of my low RESPECT LEVEL, like many other people I put people first, usually ahead of myself, things second and money last but as I am building the highest RESPECT LEVEL I have ever had, my core belief about money is shifting to Suze’s philosophy on money in our lives … and one day, the financial wealth I always dreamed of but did not believe was possible will be mine, especially now that God is in the mix too. As I am discovering, The Bible has lots of financial guidance too and stories of unparalleled success when one lines up with His advice on money matters.

After my studies and transformed thoughts about money and its effective management, I firmly believe Suze’s book, The Money Class, broken down in sections, should be part of the education system from middle school to high school and onward into colleges and universities … that is, if we want a more responsible and viable economic community built on the strengths of solid financial knowledge and a high enough RESPECT LEVEL to make debt, particularly the debilitating kind, a thing of the past … I know I am and even just the idea of that freedom fills me with such peace and amazement … I so look forward to that day, yet I am also enjoying the journey of becoming debt free by starting with the changing of my mindset.

These two things alone will radically change our world for the better. I hope it does yours, for the ones you love and even for those you just respect … value … because they are people just trying to do the best they can too.

April 16, 2014

Kaitlin A. Trepanier
http://www.kaitlinatrepanier.com

All Rights Reserved by DARK HORSES PRODUCTIONS/KAITLIN A. TREPANIER … Advocate, Creative Writer and The RESPECT SPECIALIST responsible for the creation of the global initiative Connecting the Dots … with The RESPECT PRINCIPLE … because every child … every person … should know, by their own experience, they are valued … RESPECTED.

Cats and dogs … the cost paid for our love … huge vet bills or neglect, abuse and euthanization

The facts and the story … we can do better!

According to statistics from the Ontario SPCA and other animal protection groups and service providers, thousands of cats and dogs are killed on purpose each year in shelters because of their sheer volume.

A volume created by cats and dogs not being spayed and neutered so they cannot have more unwanted babies that grow into the cats and dogs that have to be euthanized.

But kittens and puppies are cute. Many people want the cute babies … but not so much when they find out the commitment they need, the care, cost and training they need and of course, that cats and dogs, like people, lose their baby cuteness and the behavior and antics that once seemed cute and endearing are troublesome and are desired gone … and if they do not disappear as their owners wish, many of the cats and dogs are forced to disappear by being released in the country, dropped off at shelters, neglected, abused and even killed by their adoptive parent(s) or strangers.

Then there is the disparity between what veterinary clinics charge for spaying/neutering and what places like the SPCA charge. Vet clinic prices ranges start around $400.00, though locally, the total charge is even higher once all the other costs are added, but the SPCA offers the same service for $65.00 Canadian and additional costs are minimal in comparison to vet clinics. Even spending the dollars to get to their three locations in Barrie, Newmarket and St. Catharines is still less than half of driving a few miles or even thirty miles to nearby vet clinics.

It is ironic too, that many of the people who often need cats and dogs the most, are often those with little else in their lives, including money, but their cats and dogs.

I am writing this entry because of what I experienced in the past year and a half since I rescued an alley cat that found its way into my life one autumn night one and a half years ago when the seven-month old calico tomcat stood on his hind legs and reached up to me when I entered the basement of a place I was employed.

With a tiny thirteen-year old female cat at home, I was reluctant to take the alley cat home, but there he was. No one else wanted him, shelters were full and he was begging for a home. At the same time, most of my free time was consumed with my Dad’s care, as was my income, that was not fully supporting me and my Dad’s needs, so I did not have the money to have the tomcat fixed right away. But then, because he was not fixed, one horrific tom fight a few months later drove me to rush him into the vet clinic for an emergency appointment. A $300 invoice later with a quote for several hundred dollars more to be spent to neuter him, the escalating costs of being available for my Dad as well as the incredibly high hydro bills of this area, plus having to quit two jobs to be accessible for emergency care for my Dad has made it impossible for me to yet have the now two-year old tom neutered with the local high prices.

One day that will change and my tomcat will be a tom only in his dreams. It has been suggested I add his body to the pile of cats to be euthanized since no one else came forward to give him a home in response to my ads. It has been suggested, quietly and almost silently, that I set him free once again, since after all that is how he spent the first several months of his life. Even when I talk of how his companionship fills a void, how he loves to be near me, how he, along with my other furry friend, make me laugh and keep me company, there is talk of what a problem he is because he wants to be outside tomcatting.

But interestingly enough, no one from this area told me in the past year and a half when I had the resources and vehicle to take him to be neutered at the SPCA that the SPCA even offered this service for such a low-cost in comparison to local fees. So I am also writing this for all the cat and dog lovers in this area to inform them there is an alternative to adding yet another cat or dog to the feral cat and dog population or to the euthanized pile of bodies … with the request that when someone rescues an animal, adopts a new furry friend, tell them they have choices if financing the surgery may be too costly for them here. In fact, take one step further animal lover and drive the animal and its owner to one of the SPCA locations yourself. You will feel good about your good deed and you will prevent more cat and dog bodies from being abandoned, neglected, abused or killed because they are considered disposable because of our low RESPECT LEVEL for their lives.

March 15, 2014

Kaitlin A. Trepanier
http://www.kaitlinatrepanier.com

All Rights Reserved by DARK HORSES PRODUCTIONS/KAITLIN A. TREPANIER … CREATIVE WRITER, ADVOCATE, and PROJECT SPECIALIST responsible for the creation of the global initiative Connecting the Dots … with The RESPECT PRINCIPLE … because every child … every person … should know, by their own experience, they are valued … RESPECTED.