Mental Health … or Just Broken Hearts and Spirits?

Science has shown that depression, in time, actually manifests itself in people’s brains and bodies, affecting the chemicals in our brains that motivate or de-motivate us.

The “key” to consider I believe is the “in time” label.

First, let us remember that some people are born with the chemical imbalance that causes depression and its often disastrous side effects, particularly suicide.

But let’s also consider how people not born with the chemical brain imbalance become depressed.

In a world constantly affirming that no one is entitled to respect … to be valued … unless someone in authority says so … people becoming depressed is easy to understand.

When a child is taught by their experience, as the majority of children are based on the results generated from the beginning till now, that their “value’ is determined by others’ thoughts and expectations, such a child loses his or her identity in the process of pleasing others to gain their respect … to feel valued … and therefore safe, protected … but relying on others not only will disappoint children, but also in reality also has the potential to cause great harm and severe danger, including death by violence, suicide or murder.

The training tool employed by the Disrespect Philosophy unconsciously driving our world is the repetitive “breaking” of hearts and spirits. Some people call the effect depression; something wrong that becomes wrong or broken in people’s minds but both my own experience and my research indicate otherwise. Both indicate the precursor to the level of depression that creates havoc with a life has more to do with the repetitive damage done to a person’s heart and spirit … and if not healed, opens the path for depression to sink into the cells of one’s brain and body.

In other words, the real mental health challenge is not depression, but its root cause, disrespect.

For some people depression that has been inside one too long needs to be treated with medication as well as the personal work to discover the damage done to one’s heart and spirit and to heal so one can move forward; however, what I found the most helpful was the discovery of where and when, the personal journey to heal … that increased my RESPECT LEVEL to a high enough level …. so I could reclaim my identity … and then to a higher RESPECT LEVEL that resulted in my reconnecting with my spirituality … all of which finally resulted in my experiencing the peace nothing else generated in my fifty plus years, along with the confidence, courage and direction to finally move upward and forward.

Family and friends thought I lost “it” twenty years ago when I walked away from everything and everyone I knew. What no one seemed to understand or wanted to hear was I had not lost my mind, but instead my heart and spirit had lost the desire to use my mind … that is the difference between depression and a nervous breakdown from a brokenness deep in the core of one’s self.

Science is a great tool and methodology to help us understand ourselves and our world, but like all things and fields of study, science is only a part of the big picture. Labels are created to help us understand our differences and each other, but labelling in itself quickly becomes prejudicial in a world still driven by the unconscious belief we are only as valuable as we are labelled … worthy of respect, worthy of being valued or worthy of being rejected, abandoned, denied, reshaped, conformed … etc.

In light of this train of thought, perhaps we can re-consider the stigma attached to mental health for what it is too … yet another level of prejudice created by the Disrespect Philosophy’s premise … no one is valuable unless someone in authority … decides someone is worthy.

The question begged then is the Disrespect Philosophy and its fallout problems of broken hearts, broken spirits and eventually the mental health problems, including depression what we want to serve as our legacy?

February 21, 2014

Kaitlin A. Trepanier
http://www.kaitlinatrepanier.com

All Rights Reserved by DARK HORSES PRODUCTIONS/KAITLIN A. TREPANIER, Getting YOU the RESPECT YOU Want … Connecting the Dots … with The RESPECT PRINCIPLE Author, Writer, Playwright, Poet, Lyricist, Artist, Advocate, Speaker, Researcher, Analyst, Developer, Project Specialist, Creative Director, Founder … because every child … every person … should know, by their own experience, they are valued … RESPECTED.

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Truth or Deception? I would not change a thing because …

Many of have heard people say or perhaps we have said the words ourselves, “I would not change a thing in my life because of what I have learned and the results in my life now.”

I used to believe this too, though now I call this thinking a fallacy because of a question that arose … does this kind of thinking empower us to make our world and the world-at-large a better place so we all thrive? Or are we just continuing to accept this hand-me-down mentality and passing its limitations onto the next generations?

After considering this mindset extensively I realize this perspective is yet another deception the Disrespect Philosophy creates to keep us small, with little expectation or hope, repeating the past over and over, instead of empowering us to create significant lasting personal and cultural change.

I will give you my scenario and hopefully as you read this, you will consider yours … from both perspectives.

For years I thought all the very limiting and negative experiences my life was filled with were my fault … including the abuses I experienced as a child … for being misunderstood, different, pre-judged, starving for acceptance and as a result, vulnerable to people who prey, consciously or not, on the vulnerability of the broken-hearted and the broken-spirited with promises that eventually caused me great harm … the dangerous kind of harm that reduces a child’s, a youth’s, an adult’s RESPECT LEVEL to such a low-level one keeps attracting the same level of disrespect from others … reinforcing and reducing one’s RESPECT LEVEL that turns what started out to be a happy, loving being into a negative, frightened being who seeks to hurt first in relationships or runs away or uses habits as distractions.

Then being forced to make changes to survive, I then embraced the idea that I had to go through all I did in life so I could do what I am doing … advocating, writing, creating; however, based on an idea that grew into the premise, Connecting the Dots … with The RESPECT PRINCIPLE. As a result, now I know for years I was being deceived by our global Disrespect Philosophy or if you are a Christian believer, as I am again, you would say it was the Enemy. Because I know this now, I also know this fallacy created yet another deception … another fallacy … the one that still wants me to believe and reinforce by saying, “I would not change a thing in my life because of what I have learned and the results in my life now.”

For now I see through this veil of deception imprisoning most of us.

For in truth, if we lived in a global culture of “Respect for all life,” based on The RESPECT PRINCIPLE, we would bring children into a world where we would have made the “Respect Full” changes to ensure all children would not have to qualify or be approved of in order to receive healthy food, shelter, clothing, medicine, education and if not love, at least RESPECT, the simple recognition that they, as the unique individuals they are, are valued … are valuable … just for being who they are.

In my case, if my parents, family, school, community, province and country had a high enough RESPECT LEVEL for those more different from themselves, they would have sought to discover what personality type I was, what were my primary and secondary communicating and learning styles, what type of learning environment I needed to develop my own identity, boundaries and a healthy RESPECT LEVEL for myself, and as a result, for others, thereby developing to the best ability the social skills to interact well with the world in all my relationships.

But they did not know my personality type thrives on study, research, exploration and then lots of analysis, introspection, problem solving, and creativity. They did not know my personality type’s mind receives vast internal stimulation whereas the majority of people require external stimulation from the world around them to keep them engaged mentally and that when I am in the external world too long, I shutdown to protect myself. But of course, the irony is, shutting down and withdrawing from those people whose brains require vast external stimulation often, because of ignorance, misjudge and mistreat those who withdraw, often taking their withdrawal personally, which ultimately puts those trying to protect themselves in more danger.

They did not know how their ignorance and their demand for 100% conformity broke my heart and my spirit as well as contributed to the harm to my body … inflicted by others and my self because of my low RESPECT LEVEL for myself.

And this is where many people will say, “But look at what you have learned, who you have become … a writer, author, advocate and so much more,” but I say this now, “But look at how much more I could have given to the world, at what a better citizen, student, role model, wife, daughter, sister, friend, supporter, community member I could have been all my life … if I knew from experience I was valued and aided accordingly for who I was and for my unique gifts, talents and abilities. I tell you who I would have been, what I would have done, the life I would have lived … I would have been placed in a Montessori school where self-directed education is best suited for my personality type. I would have received an athletic scholarship for the physical prowess and stamina I inherited from both of my parents. Because of my natural desire to study, I would have a few degrees, would be a lifelong successful author, an altruistic entrepreneur and so much more. I would not have married twice because I would have made better choices for me because I would have known myself better and not tried to get my value through other people whether in relationships or work I did. I would have been more respectful of others … their feelings, their things and I would have enjoyed happier and healthier relationships with my family.

Though this is my story, this is also everyone’s story … just look at our world.

Now that my years of study, research, analysis and problem-solving have revealed the lies and deceptions for what they are, now I am being who I was destined to be, doing what I was destined to do, life is good and my life will one day reflect that good … but if I had grown up in a world with a higher RESPECT LEVEL, my whole life would have bore the fruit of being who I really am … all my life and not just in the last half of my life … and the world I was in contact with during my lifetime would have been better for that experience.

If I could, I would change almost everything about my life, starting with my early years, where in photos I find a happy, joyful, exuberant child ready to explore the world, but since I cannot do it over for me, I am dedicated to shedding the light on the darkness … on the lies and deceptions the Disrespect Philosophy, the Enemy have used to hold us as prisoners.

I hope and pray you will too … it is never too late to be who you are meant to be.

February 17, 2014

Kaitlin A. Trepanier
http://www.kaitlinatrepanier.com

All Rights Reserved by DARK HORSES PRODUCTIONS/KAITLIN A. TREPANIER, Getting YOU the RESPECT YOU Want … Connecting the Dots … with The RESPECT PRINCIPLE Author, Writer, Playwright, Poet, Lyricist, Artist, Advocate, Speaker, Researcher, Analyst, Developer, Project Specialist, Creative Director, Founder … because every child … every person … should know, by their own experience, they are valued … RESPECTED.

Karma, Reaping What We Sow or Lifetime Prisoners to Disrespect Philosophy Thinking?

What if what is accepted as karma … getting back what you gave … reaping what you sow … really is a fallacy based on the Disrespect Philosophy, the premise no one or nothing is valuable unless some one or some group says so?

Not that I am suggesting karma or reaping what you sow does not happen … spiritually and scientifically, both are proven by research and personal experience, my own included.

What I am asking us all to reconsider is the long-term effect of believing as we do instead of recognizing that living in a world driven by the unconscious belief, the Disrespect Philosophy, we may experience karma or reaping what we sow … repeatedly, because when we don’t change our negative belief about the karma or what we reaped as only an effect … a temporary one … we become prisoners of such thinking and will continue to experience over and over and over the same karma … the same reaping … which will reinforce our negative thinking and the negative thinking and judgment of others about us … thereby constantly reinforcing the Disrespect Philosophy that keeps individuals, families, communities, cultures and nations, including our global nation, prisoners of a core belief that has imprisoned us, as history shows, for centuries.

Breaking free results from becoming aware of what one’s core beliefs are … as reflected by the results we generate … and then doing our work to change our thinking to generate new results by new actions … breaking the karmic and harvesting cycle of what we once sowed to reap the benefits of our new seeds.

The majority of us are driven by what has been driving humanity since the beginning of time whether you look at it from a spiritual perspective or from a rationale, intellectual, scientific perspective. The Bible calls Satan the deceiver … one who lies about who people are as children of God. The deceiver from a scientific, intellectual rationale perspective I call the Disrespect Philosophy, which as humankind’s history and presence show, we are to treat no one with respect unless we or someone else has decided such a person or group is worthy of being respected … valued.

The opposite, empowering, compassionate as well as logical and practical rationale is the Respect Philosophy, which I renamed as The RESPECT PRINCIPLE simply because a principle means a foundational or core belief. Recognizing the results we and the world generate based on our global unconscious belief is the first step. Raising one’s personal RESPECT LEVEL is the next step because when our own RESPECT LEVEL rises, as I have experienced firsthand, so do results we then generate, reflect our reaping new growth, breaking free of the karma from the negative thinking that has shaped our lives.

We all fall down because we all make mistakes … that is if we are living, taking chances and risks to keep learning and growing … which means sometimes we fall or fail. The Disrespect Philosophy or Satan, whatever your belief, will do their best to keep you down and imprisoned till what’s left of your life is but a shadow of what we can become … and I believe with all my heart that most of us are so much more than what we have come to believe … regardless of the how and why.

Today, I say to you … you are so much more. I know this because I have been a prisoner of a low RESPECT LEVEL for most of my life … valuing other people more than myself, putting their needs first … but I firmly believe we are all valuable in our own unique ways and that when we discover what those ways are, we create the best life for our self and therefore have our best self to share with the world … and that together, there is nothing that will stop us from finally breaking free so we can create a better world … the likes of which has not yet been seen in humanity’s time.

So, what is holding you prisoner? Or are you one of the fortunate few already free?

Regardless, bravo to you, for making the changes you need to be who you are destined to be!

February 15, 2014

Kaitlin A. Trepanier
http://www.kaitlinatrepanier.com

All Rights Reserved by DARK HORSES PRODUCTIONS/KAITLIN A. TREPANIER, Getting YOU the RESPECT YOU Want … Connecting the Dots … with The RESPECT PRINCIPLE Developer, Author, Speaker, Playwright, Altruistic Entrepreneur, and Human Rights Activist <strong … because every child … every person … should know, by their own experience, they are valued … RESPECTED.

Connecting “Prejudice” … with The RESPECT PRINCIPLE … Special Feature “Scientific American’s Our Unconscious Mind” Article

As with any word people can have variations on a word’s definition, but a word like prejudice is fairly straightforward. Its spelling defines its meaning. Prejudice is simply our act of pre-judging something … a person, place, experience, belief, etc., but history and the present show globally how we perceive some prejudices as small and acceptable and some as big and unacceptable, all of which are dependent on a number of variables … most of them harmful and even dangerous.

However, based on the Connecting the Dots … with the RESPECT PRINCIPLE, our prejudice variables are greatly influenced by our internalized and our community’s externalized RESPECT LEVEL.

Before proceeding, let’s keep in mind that most of what drives our unconscious thoughts and actions is a deep, negative, global conditioning I call the Disrespect Philosophy … the core belief that no one is worthy or entitled to be valued … respected … without some qualifier … without someone’s or some stamp of approval by some group … and this is the root of both our small and big prejudices … and fortuitously the January 2014 Scientific American confirms my premise that our unconscious mind drives more of our thoughts and actions than perhaps we care to acknowledge … Check this out

Journal of Scientific American
January 2014 (Psychology)

Our Unconscious Mind
Article Pages 30-37

By John A. Bargh, a professor of psychology at Yale University. His Automaticity in Cognition, Motivation and Evaluation Lab at Yale investigates unconscious influences on behavior and questions such as to the extent of what free will exists.

Unconscious impulses and desires impel what we think and do in ways Freud never dreamed of.

IN BRIEF (4 boxes on bottom of page 32)

DECISION MAKING often occurs without people giving much conscious thought to how they vote, what they buy, where they go on vacation or the way they negotiate a myriad of other life choices.

UNCONSCIOUS PROCESSES underlie the way we deliberate and plan our lives – and for good reason. Automatic judgments, for one, are essential for dodging on oncoming car or bus.

BEHAVIORS governed by the unconscious go beyond looking both ways at the corner. Embedded attitudes below the level of awareness shape many of our attitudes toward others.

SIGMUND FREUD meditated on the meaning of the unconscious throughout his career. These newer studies provide a more pragmatic perspective on how we relate to a boss or spouse.

When psychologists try to understand the way our mind works, they frequently come to a conclusion that may seem startling: people often make decisions without having given them much thought – or, more precisely, before they have thought about them consciously. When we decide how to vote, what to buy, where to go on vacation and myriad other things, unconscious thoughts that we are not even aware of typically play a big role. Research has recently brought to light just how profoundly our unconscious mind shapes our day-to-day interactions. Page 32

Post-Freudian psychology has set aside the id and the ego for a more pragmatic take on what defines our unconscious self. Nobel laureate Daniel Kahneman has described the modern distinction between the automatic and the controlled. In his best-selling book, Thinking Fast and Slow
… Top left column, page 33

The unconscious way we perceive people during the course of the day is a reflexive action. We must exert wilful, conscious effort to put aside the unexplained and sometimes unwarranted negative feelings that we may harbor towards others. The stronger the unconscious influence, the harder we have to work consciously to overcome it … The ability to regulate our own behavior-whether making friends, getting up to speed at a new job or overcoming a drinking problem-depends on more than genes, temperament and social support networks. It also hinges, in no small measure, on our capacity to identify and try to overcome the automatic impulses and emotions that in influence every aspect of our waking life. To make our way in the world, we need to learn to come to terms with our unconscious self. Mid-page of page 33

GUT REACTIONS
When we meet someone new, we form a first impression even before striking up a conversation. We may observe the person’s race, sex or age-features that, once perceived, automatically connect to our internalized stereotypes about how members of a particular group are apt to behave. These assumptions … Bottom left column, page 33

CHECK OUT the COLOR TEST on the top right column of page 33

OUT OF CONTROL
Unconscious thoughts and feelings influence not only the way we perceive ourselves and the world around us but also our everyday actions. Bottom right page 34

EMBODIED COGNITION
Some of the research on the unconscious and behavior focuses on the way the surrounding physical environment influences our psychological state of mind. Bottom left page 36

Why Some Social Science Studies Fail on top of page 34
…Still, the overall body of evidence collected so far clearly shows that unconscious influences on judgment, emotion, behavior and motivation are of practical importance both to society as a whole and to the everyday lives of its members.

FREUD REDUX
… that means we can set aside antiquated notions of Oedipus complexes and accept the reality that the unconscious assets its presence in every moment of our lives, when we are fully awake as well as when we are absorbed in the depths of a dream.

NOW AVAILABLE online or you can watch the author talk about how the unconscious affects our behaviors at ScientificAmerican.com/jan2014/unconscious

In the end, prejudice, like unhealthy competition, compels us to constantly judge others in contrast to ourselves. When people do not mirror us and our beliefs, we pre-judge them as unworthy or wrong or even dangerous because people with low RESPECT LEVELS believe other people must be like them in order to be approved, to feel safe with and therefore worthy of respect in their interactions with them.

To end what was, awareness is the beginning, but a global culture shift in our driving unconscious Disrespect Philosophy is ultimately the change agent we need to create a better world for all life to thrive.

February 9 and 11, 2014

Kaitlin A. Trepanier
http://www.kaitlinatrepanier.com

All Rights Reserved by DARK HORSES PRODUCTIONS/KAITLIN A. TREPANIER, Getting YOU the RESPECT YOU Want … Connecting the Dots … with The RESPECT PRINCIPLE Developer, Author, Speaker, Playwright, Altruistic Entrepreneur, and Human Rights Activist … because every child … every person … should know, by their own experience, they are valued … RESPECTED.

Bullying … The “Disrespect Philosophy’s” Enforcer

From a secular view, the dominant philosophy that has shaped humans since the beginning of time is Disrespect.

The Disrespect Philosophy is simple. Its premise is that no person or life is valuable until someone says it is … based on what that someone, or a collective of “someones” say what is to be valued … respected.

In other words, the Disrespect Philosophy is about control: control that is misunderstood in contrast to true power. Control simply is a lack of trust in and of the world for life to be fair, for resources to be available to all … which all of our fears are driven by … thereby creating a low RESPECT LEVEL that we have been conditioned to use to fill the void of not feeling valued … respected in the Disrespect Philosophy world humanity has been living in for thousands of years … because not enough of us have connected the dots to see what we keep recreating … which, by the way, the Disrespect Philosophy strives to do in order to keep itself and its enforcers in power.

The guard and enforcer of the Disrespect Philosophy is bullying: the means used to coerce others into accepting the Disrespect Philosophy without question. How? Simply by the conviction we are taught that no one is valuable unless someone(s) says they are and the qualifiers for being considered valuable are based on the whims of those who have put themselves in positions of power to control.

Without high enough RESPECT LEVELS in families, family members are subject to the negative conditioning and the power struggle ensues. Those who take power do so by bullying. Sometimes subtle, often ingenious, sometimes emotional, psychological or physical, bullying comes in all shapes and sizes and affects, because of our lack of awareness of the Disrespect Philosophy, everyone.

The Myers Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI) is a personality profiling system presented by Carl Jung and further developed by the Myers – Briggs team. The fundamental basis of the MBTI is there are two primary personality types: Extroverts (E) and Introverts (I). According to the MBTI, Extroverts’ brains require primarily external stimulus for their brains to work at their best, while Introverts brains, on the contrary, often need a fair amount of time to work and be alone because of the constant internal stimulation in their brains they have to contend with.

There are two significant challenges the contrasting types brings to our world. One, the world is dominated in sheer numbers by the Extroverts and two, as a result the Extroverts, in a Disrespect Philosophy driven world want the rest of the world to be like them … and as a result, the enforcers … the bullies become conditioned at a very young age.

Not that only E’s become bullies, I’s do also, but more from reaction than action.

The reason is the Introverts are more driven by their brains to reflect, plus research, study, and analyze differences and as a result tend to be more understanding and often accepting of other people’s differences. Extraverts, on the other hand, will often respond to Introverts’ quietness, reserve and withdrawal as a rejection of them and in our Disrespect Philosophy world take the I’s actions personally … and the battles begin by employing the different methods of bullying: prejudging, teasing, belittling, tormenting, harassing, rejecting, isolating, neglecting, violating, abusing, and killing … spirits as well bodies.

Many Introverts, especially those with the dominant function of “Feeling” will often withdraw inward further or may even remove themselves physically to avoid battles with Extroverts which they will seldom win fighting in the Extraverted bullying manner … but, instead will use time and strategies to fight such battles. Without high RESPECT LEVELS, it is a lose lose proposition for both.

Extroverted bullies need audiences; Introverted bullies eventually seek quiet revenge … yet since we are driven to be more Extroverted to be in our Disrespect Philosophy driven world, Extroverts and Introverts can act very contrary to their natural, inherent personality type.

What happens in our childhood years does not stay in our childhood years … including the bullying (conditional love) we have been shaped by … it follows us no matter where we go … school, community, work, and into all of our relationships. The only way we become free from the Disrespect Philosophy enforcer, bullying, is to recognize it for what it is … something that strives to make us feel less valuable than everyone else so we bully others to make ourselves feel more valuable than others and therefore keep the world spinning out of control by the chaos maker, the Disrespect Philosophy.

We are valuable … each and every one of us for the unique gifts, talents and strengths we have to contribute to help make the world, including our personal and private worlds, better places to live … to thrive.

December 16, 2013

Kaitlin A. Trepanier
http://www.kaitlinatrepanier.com

All Rights Reserved by DARK HORSES PRODUCTIONS/KAITLIN A. TREPANIER, Connecting the Dots … with The RESPECT PRINCIPLE Developer, Author, Speaker, Playwright, Altruistic Entrepreneur, and Human Rights Activist … because every child … every person … should know, by their own experience, they are valued … RESPECTED.

“You are not defined …”

“You are not defined by your past. You are prepared by your past.”

This passage from #1 New York Bestselling Author Joel Osteen’s book, Break Out, struck a deep chord within me yesterday as I am “breaking free,” like the DARK HORSE I became after my first attempt almost twenty years ago to become who I really am … a very unique individual with an unconventional personality type, perspective, and a drive for a different life from the “normal” I was born into and lived in most of my life … at great cost to myself and to my family and society … because when we do not live true to our heart, our heart will close its doors to living a life that is a lie because it is not a reflection of who we really are … and ultimately we all lose when we treat ourselves so disrespectfully.

Like you, I am not defined by my past, but it has certainly prepared me for my future … the one in my heart I have always known I am meant to be … and the one I am embracing as I move forward into the life my heart tells me I am destined to live.

Thank you “past” for my “future.” And thank you Joel Osteen for being the writer and messenger you are too.

December 11, 2013

Kaitlin A. Trepanier
http://www.kaitlinatrepanier.com

All Rights Reserved by DARK HORSES PRODUCTIONS/KAITLIN A. TREPANIER, Connecting the Dots … with The RESPECT PRINCIPLE Developer, Author, Speaker, Playwright, Altruistic Entrepreneur, and Human Rights Activist … because every child … every person … should know, by their own experience, they are valued … RESPECTED.

Not Getting the Results We Want?

Everything we do is driven by the beliefs we have … our philosophy … based on our experience, our feelings, the impact of other people and their choices, plus our conscious choices … so, if we are not getting the results we want, we have to change our beliefs to get the results we want.

Not an easy task, but we are all worth the effort.

The bonus … we reap the benefits from our and everyone’s efforts to change our world by changing our beliefs to generate the results we want … peace, abundance, joy, prosperity … RESPECT for all.

October 14, 2013

Kaitlin A. Trepanier
http://www.kaitlinatrepanier.com

All Rights Reserved by DARK HORSES PRODUCTIONS/KAITLIN A. TREPANIER, Connecting the Dots … with The RESPECT PRINCIPLE Developer, Author, Speaker, Playwright, Altruistic Entrepreneur, and Human Rights Activist … because every child should know, by their own experience, they are valued … RESPECTED